In a world of political correctness and gender considerations it has become difficult for a male to touch certain subjects. I have followed feminism for many years because I am interested in getting rid of male supremacy. The following lines are written with regard to many observations I made in recent years, and since I know the subject could push certain bottons I ask for gentle consideration. I believe the subject has also a lot to do with spiritual growth because it touches modes of perception and behaviour.
I also know that the subject needs a deeper and more detailed research. This is only a little summery.
Noli me tangere! (Don`t touch me!)
I observe many things around me, and some have meaning to me. I have spoken many times also with females about this: in Germany - and I assume it is similar in many western countries - the female generation under 40 has obviously a problem with aggression.
I see ladies with kids running through the streets with no sense of consideration. Any person saying a word to the kid is treated as enemy.
A special case is public traffic. In certain cases it is difficult driving to a road, because other drivers won`t let you in. Men are more gentle to stop letting the driver in. They have found out that females are much less ready to stop - 1 out of 12.
And while men tend to walk longer ways with their kids bringing them to school, females come with their cars right in front of the school even if the road is crowded and start not seldem fighting over a parking lot.
Frustrated men told me from the female aggression they encoutered at the weekend dance floors. No question that many men are somewhat assholish in trying to speak with woman, but many experience no recognition, no eyes contact, no kind word, no fluent conversation but lots of complaints on "bad boys". Many men have indeed difficulties and fears exposeing themselves as men being soft. They experience the old paradigma still working - women complain about "macho assholes" but secretly love to meet one. This is disturbing.
The Princess and the Pea
What happened to those females under 40? What difficulties they had?
Actually their parents raised them as their little princes and princesses avoiding to criticize them too much. And they have failed teaching them culturized behaviour. The reasons are manyfold and depend partly from educational paradigms which used to be public.
This generation was born into a time where it became politically incorrect to critisize females. Feminism had worked with the model of "females being victims". And this horse once being saddled served as vehicle to avoid criticism of females.
Police told me that 50% of contemporary home violence comes from females, and nobody is talking about that publicly. Males who experience violent females have no courage to go to police. They feel as wimps and losers. I know a guy whose wife was often beating him up, and it took years before he dared to speak.
Lost Equilibrium
Both, males and females, undergo difficult times in perceiving managable roles, and the gender debate made it not much easier.
I remember around 1991. There was a big meeting of over a thousand women for a congress. A famous feminist researcher - a female professor - gave a speech and asked then for discussion.
I had a question and raised my hand. She asked me to go to the micro in front of 1000 women and a couple men. I was the first one with a question.
Then the hell break loose. The ladies started yelling at me and I heard cries like "men out of here". This was the time the female professor came close to me laying her arm around me and asked for silence. Then she asked if they had nothing understood. Feminism, she said, is a mindful thing. It would always come to the point finding peace with males on a new level. Why are you yelling at this man, she said. And it became silent, and I went away wondering...
Males have difficulties finding a new role as men, and females have similar difficulties. We will not save the problem in here. But both have lost equilibrium.
The professor I mentioned above was a very lovely lady, I loved her very much. Her name was Dorothee Soelle. You may google for her.
She said that we must support each other to find our new roles as males and females. Males must stop considering themselves as head, and females must stop considering themselves as victim and weak barby doll. We must start a new conversation without aggression and tooo much demands. Soelle said, the ground of creation is love besides all liberation and fights and misunderstandings.
Still Being in the Hot Seat
What I want to say now I do not mean offensive, and I have no intention to harm anybody neither.
I believe that there was a stong feminist movement in the US, and most people had resentments because of their christian belief systems.
US americans had many resentments against many thinking systems. Only a few knew Phyllis Trible or Angela Davis or Elisabeth Moltmann-Wendel. A few only have read Susan Sontag. And many didn`t ever read Noam Chomsky, to name a couple wonderful thinker.
The results are unbelievable. In 1999 I worked in Erie/Pa for an educational program. They had a teenager pregnancy rate of 14%!
The Lady Gaga Syndrome
I will not go deeper in this but point to a final thing. Since advertisement discovered female sexuality as seducting tool, the case has now come to the climax. Lady Gaga is presenting a new image of females - the image of a cool, nice looking but independent (she said, that she has no sex before a concert, because it would steal energy through her vagina) and men killing (Gagag is often killing the wimpy men in her vids) entity. It is no female in the old sense, but a cold and biting creature. Is there any thought on what impression this might have on men?
The Wimpy Man or Men As Side Effects of Creation
The contemporary German (and I assume the Western) man is either trying to play in a league satisfying a woman in order to get her in the bed or he celebrates a withdrawal in such kind that he cares for traditional values - diligence, reliability and a bit naivety. And unfortunately this kind of man finds only attention on the second look.
The service to the grown up princess finds it`s expression in unbelievable ways. A man told me from his crush he described as "absolutely divine". When he came to her for his first night he got deeply disturbed. Before allowing the love game she gave him a long lecture on female orgasms and how he should act. You can imagine what happened. He was so deeply impressed that nothing happened. She left him because she was convinced he was a dead loss in bed.
I`ll leave it this way now. I post this in a spiritual forum in order to show some backrounds making it difficult to have an almost easygoing communication. Man and woman are in a deep process of transformation and are often unable to understand each other, often also not willing. This has many reasons. I think getting aware of this might help finding first steps of understanding.
I ask again for gentle consideration...
Replies
I myself have been a victim of an angry girl, she misunderstood a situation and it finished with me being beaten up by her fellow boy-lovers (alcohol involved!). Anyway, i forgive her and hope she can forgive herself too :) I never reported this to the police, i dont really know why. I was young and stupid, maybe that's why. Also, I don't believe that repressive actions have any healing effect, except maybe when you are locked up by yourself for a while, then you have a chance to find yourself. But will you stick to yourself when let out? That is the hard part and most people seem to fail (i am not better at any way, but i'm trying at least.) I was locked up for a while because of stupidity and greed in my past, but i learned a lesson... I really hope i can be a better person and spread love instead of misury. I did find myself but the hard part is sticking to it, as i said. But it doesnt have to be hard if you have a worldview based on love.
Very well written and you seem to have a deep insight in this, thank you for sharing your thoughts. Girls raised alone usually arn't raised 'properly', although i don't really have any guidelines to hand out at this moment.
I reserve myself for errors, misunderstandings and offtopics (not too great at english)
Such a pertinent article. I'd like to respond from the age group you talk of, Im 32 and my husband is 42, I guess we compliment the age group in discussion here. Lets just say for a moment that all the people, female and male that you talk of above, battle with finding spirituality, compassion, love and respect. There seems to be a large amount of dis-respect in these severe right and left wing groups, female and male.
When I was younger, I always wanted to defend the feminine nature of life and so started going to a lot of power groups represented by women. I did not like them at all, women were scorned, raped, abused, beaten, poor and everyone was their to blame the male race. I no longer defend this initiative, until honesty prevails amongst the scorned women, blaming men for their failures in life. And by no means, do I pick on the women who have been severely tormented by real evil beings, and not using the word men for a reason. I was raped as a teenager, but by no means do I blame the power of men, it was due to racial change and democracy in South Africa that I was raped, I to, had an abusive boyfriend, who now in his new relationship is caring towards his new partner, together we both have learned something and have moved on.
With regards to men, political change, economical change and life in general has a huge impact on men's ego. For example, we talking about the 40yrs here, and in South Africa when democracy and globalization took form and economical growth took preference over other things. What this meant, was that all of a sudden, women in financial sectors were earning more money than their physically stronger male counterparts, and labor and technical work becomes the least payed job per hour. A lot of men did not cope well with this, Ive seen it amongst the people I know, they have been conditioned to be the family strength and shield, and now all of a sudden, women become powerful to the extent they lay down the rules and say GET OUT, you dont earn enough. Forgive them for being a part of a long history that states their dominance.
Again, both scenarios are very valid in a world with no respect, a world where the concept of finding ones self, and independents is become a selfish behavior rather than an enlightening one, that can be shared.
Well, I love being the female, and thank god for my male husband. Its not about how much he or I earn, its about what he is good at, and what I am good at. I feel protected with his male dominance and strength, physically, and at the same time do not see a weakness, every now and then a tear escapes his eyes when under pressure, emotionally. Im quite happy playing the female role, even if my sons take advantage now and then, as its often mom these boys want beside the sport field and dad when they are needing to let out some male steam. So what Im saying, is that it appears my husband is more physical and Im more emotional, that to me is perfect in its form of duality.
Just on a lighter note about female aggression. Females are also seriously powerful with their minds and emotions, aggression is something they have always held true, just never voiced it before. Aggression is the very core that jerks us into a protective state, mother nature taking form, very powerful indeed. Is it healthy to abuse this power to be-little others, no, but we are living in hectic times trying to find ourselves, and we now have come somewhere in the road, where we believe finding ourselves is to separate ourselves from that which is not us, and often, I think in the physical that separates the female and male.
So in essence, if you are not happy with your wife or husband, its surely not meant to be. We put ourselves in situations that we later complain about, and it is the easy way out to blame others, been there done that. One of my favorite couple sayings, from the movie "Big Fat Greek Wedding", "The man might be the head of the house, but the women is the neck and can turn the head what ever way she wants", hehehehehehehe, just love it.
Well, that was a nice read! Thank you!
Hmmm . . .
I'm still looking forward to the return of the City of Zion. Idyllic as it is, to live among immortals, I'd rather be among them than be in society today. I think men's and women's roles have been perverted through perversion of the Women's Lib movement. In the ideal Family, the Man typically is the hunter and protector, and the woman is the nurturer and gatherer. These have been perverted, and if you look closely, they are trying to destroy the Nuclear family through sex warfare. They have largely succeeded.
I can't seem to find a proper childbearing mate from among my people. The daughters of Zion are haughty and proud, and it's hard to find someone who is committed to Yahushua. The daughters of Zion think, wrongfully, that they are better than the sons of Zion; and if they get married they immediately start to change them. A couple of my friends were censured because of this attitude and I had a hard time dealing with it.
As a result, I have to be even more selective. :) Especially when Yahushua observes that more and more people are getting married for the fun and not the product. Inviting spirits to live with you in the flesh is a holy act. It should be the goal of the daughters of Zion to be mothers of righteous children and not henpeck their husbands.
These are fine and carefully selected words. Thank you very much!
I've noticed that women in the workplace are much bitchier, than men (not to say all us ladies are the same)
but some of the stuff that goes on is so darn petty (he said, she said)... and not productive at all.
To think the suffrogetes is my ideal of women who dont take a c*** and are willing to go to prison for it, thats my kind of role model! haha
I think the 3d system needs to account for women's stuff, (like being a mother) and oh the big one for me: periods too; cos when i get mine; i cant even concentrate on work properly; yet cos its a *male* system that is NOT taken into account.
Being originally off planet; im from a place where the men and women dont differentiate between the sexes, a female can do what a male can do , they respect each other, there are no petty arguement at *work*
well seeing both sides i can say; in future im gonna keep out of petty stuff, male seem much much more calmer in a sense, (saying that i had great female colleagues) but most women are bitches straight up !
wow,
i think i'm gonna make a poster of this and put it in the girls restroom.
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