Spiritual Forum

Before i went to sleep i prayed to Prime Creator how i intentionally created with compassion love and kindness and with sincerity that i landscaped a beautiful front yard at my Dad's house and how i used all the money i had to make sure that i bought all the necessary requirements to ensure a smooth transition in the creating of a really wonderful masterpiece. This was my way of a thank you towards my dad and my brother who owns the house that this was a present back to them for helping me out when i needed help during my time with them at the time i needed them the most.
All up this cost me just around or over the $3.000 dollar mark, which i say it's not bad when i have been unemployed for approximately 6 months,today's date is now the 15th of October 2013. This is not included the rent i was paying that was 150 dollars a week towards bills and food.
Now against all odds i succeeded.
The reason i say against all odds, is that, as i was commencing the undergoing of this project, it nearly ended up not being complete, the reason why, because before my Mother passed away in 2011, i made a commitment to do a project that was unique and something different i never attempted before, it just so turned out to be the front yard at my dads place, it is totally transformed from a barron waste into a user friendly garden all around the edges with only one actual tree that happened to be a fruit tree, i think it is a nector of some sort, much like a peach tree i think. The reason why the front was chosen was because back in March the 14th Thursday at the Springvale R.S & L Club which is the returned and services league for the armed forces which includes now not before the fireman and police industry as now they get special recognition status because of their inline service for humanity, supposedly i say this with great displeasure with some of the police not quite sane in the head with seedy attitudes, that at at the R.S and L club that night i was a security officer and the R.S and L was held up during an armed robbery where i managed with the help of some heroic patrons that night managed to secure one of the three offendant to the ground, the other two escaped, but i doubt now they would be in civillian life as we seem to think that the guy we got down made sure he would not take all the full blame by himself.
Anyhow as i was getting the armed offendant down, i was within about three to six inches to being dead, and this was a startling reminder before the unveiling of my mothers Grave site with a beautiful tomb stone that was going to be erected in two weeks, i either be holding my mums hand in spirit at her grave site or be holding my Dads hand in the physical at her grave site, either way i will still be there. During my struggles i was thinking what have i actually done in my life, as it was flashing between the reality of my consciousness and the mere thought of being dead within moments.
Anyhow to my amazement, i survived that ordeal, i walked away from security, i changed my address, a stayed at my Dad's house and felt the need to miraculously design a beautiful user friendly garden that was low maintenance and was able to look lovely, well indeed it just so happens that i pulled it off with great dexterity, and at the end of the completion, i nearly gave up due to in house fighting, because as i was explaining my desire to do the front yard with my dad the night before, then along came my aunty, who thought otherwise and decided to try and change my design that i paid for with my money, that i physically was doing the work mostly by myself, trying to dig in the ground embed the posts and screw the post in the ground on the cross beam i embedded and concrete at the same time, anyone who has worked on small projects before either professionally or privately would know how difficult it is to do this, by them self, even with the minimal of two people, it is real hard, well now you know how hard i had to work, to get this project completed on time. And so I wanted to do something special and so i picked my dad as the one i wanted to help, and commenced this arduous job. I never did something that was from the heart, which is quite ironic as i felt the presence of the energy of Grace as i was doing this project and felt inspired to do it.
When i was doing the garden to the designed i desired and wanted to visualize into physicality, but the requirement and the willingness to go deep, down, into the foundations that are strong and that not a week link was in the mix, and made the foundations as strong as i could get it.
Anyhow, my point was this, during the construction with my money, and so i figured it will be o.k because i discussed this at great lengths with my Dad at what i was going to do the night before, then the very next moment out of the blue, my Aunty wanted me to do it her way, i thought in my head like fuck will i spend my money on her desire to do the front in a way that she was never ever going to help out in shape, way or form, because she has not earnt my respect for me to want to even contemplate me doing it her way. Anyhow as i was doing this project and after discussing it at great lengths with my dad, my Aunty tried to sully my plans by kind of emotionally blackmail my design by incorporating that my mother wanted the whole front yard with plants and trees, note i said this because this thus far according to my talks with Dad and his view of what kind of Garden he would want, contradicts the unnecessary point of argumentative co-horts with my Aunty as not only was it from her mouth but by the mouth of my Dad, that their was not to be any weeds or grass, as it has to be a low maintenance property and the garden to easily be maintained. Right, check that message was well understood, so the way i was designing conforms to that requirement.
However because my Aunty at the time was staying with us, kept interfering with my design and my project, as i was designing the fron to not only make 200 millimeter by 50 millimeter by 3 meter pine slabs into a sawn down version of a retaining wall, there was not to be any concrete in front of that design, which was the demanding and commanding presence of my Aunties wishes, so i said in her defence as i was mad at her that i would agree to her implied forceful idea, well she went to work, and so i concreted the front where the pertaining wall was straight after she said she did not want me to do that. That made me feel so much better, because it was becoming my design more and more i disregard what she wanted me to do and did my own thing anyway. She wanted plants all over the Garden so as soon as she said that, i made the garden around the rectangle perimeter by deliberate design and put black vinyl matting all over the front with the rectangle garden and stuck blue metal tiny minature stones about 2 and half cubic meters in the middle and made it sort of a zen-do garden. Boy that was a great feeling, because not only did i defy my aunty which was a great feeling, as i think she should have butted out and let me do it the way i wanted to in the first place, but it complied with, it had to be low maintenance, it had to be a garden in it, and it had to have no grass, and never should their be a need to weed it as less as possible was my Dad's motto, and this in which i fulfilled.
Right from day one, i used my own money, i laboured 95 percent of the project by myself and never did my dad ever needed to fret about how i was going to pay for it as over the course of six months i managed it being unemployed.
Now the point of writing this story, well a few reasons, one was, a person is setting out to use their own money, time and hard labour free of charge of course, and a gift being a gift, meaning that if you were to give your friend or loved one a present, the person receiving it should not complain if it is not quite what they want, the point to this matter is, that if you got a gift free of charge, then suck it up princesses as considering that you did not pay for it and it is a free gift, why would you see it other than terms of affection and endearment. This was somehow missing from my equation as this gift i did for my Dad was nothing but heartaches and pains, as i said before when i discuss with my Dad what plans i am about to do, then my Aunty comes along talks with my Dad and not only do i have to contend with my Aunty when she is present i also have to deal with my Dad who somehow feels like it is my Aunty taling through her and not the personality of my Dad. That doubly sucked.
Anyhow i finished the front and not one thing my Aunty asked for never came to fruition as i deliberately did it my way, i felt like i had the right to that because i paid for it, she did'nt.

Anyhow, i started to Pray to prime directive before going to bed on the 15 th of October 2013 and when i was in prayer mode i said to him that it was my intentful purpose was to give back to my Dad and my Brother for helping me in the past and much more than that it was a farewell in rememberance of my Dying Mother back in 2011 this project was also for her, it was the whole point to this endeavourous project. All i could think of was her when doing it. I was almost gave up doing this project towards the end, when my Dad had to go back to New Zealand, it is t my belief, he just loved to argue with me because he knew as i i was growing up he felt compelled to just keep picking on me, and so even in my late thirties he still felt like he had to pick on me further, but it has been to my my opinion was that, he could not afford it to back to New Zealand, as i knew financially he could not afford it due to house mortgage, but he went overseas anyway, why, because my Brother had to go to New zealand for a month, and so my Dad decided to go too, what my brother does he does. He could not then nor even now financially support himself, so why did he go. My Aunty was adamant that he was stressing, like being on an aged pension, really stresses any human out, it never did me any stressing, as i do not care if i worked or not worked, i do not see commodities as the prize, i see mozing along with my own thing as the most enjoyable moment i could do for myself, just enjoy what i have in front of me, live and learn the way i see it.  There was no justification for these weird arse arguments, but then it struck me again and as it does so wonderfully well, just like the night of the incident of the Armed robbery that took place in the R.S and L in Springvale 2013, it was the dark hats that was orchestrating these scenarios to make my life a difficult and hard life to get through. All these negative people surrounding me are not of their inner intentions, it felt like the dark hats was using their low and negative minds to combat me from behind the world of flesh to drag me down into negative atmospheric low energetic substances of ungodly proportions or something, it is this way they too can try and get to a light worker, by using the garment of another person to unleash their horrible attitudes towards thier inflicting opponents, i saw it i knew what they were doing but the people that it was using does not now nor do they see it was working in them and around them to instill bad vibes towards me. I still now think is because this way they can divide and conquer their opponents one at a time, because they no longer have the power to annihalate the world, so they take out the strongest of the strong in little incraments of units of measure until their opponent is finally worn down.
Any how in my dream after i said a prayer to Prime Creator, the exact duplicate image of the front was inside my dream soewhere during this intense dream time experience, but the front yard was lifted high in the air which was a good 6 to 12 meters in height, it was brought out into and open, and hovered around a park like field that was raised in the middle to form a little tiny hill and towards the back left of this grass noll and behind the floating front yard, i saw what appeared to be a female snake like flying serpent grey in appearance encircling me the little grassy hilly field that hovered above it my design of the front yard. I then got the impression this serpent was motherly in sentient feeling that's how i understood her presence, it felt like she was not only the divine nurturer but all if willed could also be the end of my personage, that's how powerful this being is. Anyhow this presence i felt in spirit was testing me, but at that point of no time was i unaware of the test, not until i awoke with the rememberance of what occurred. I was in a way feared this being, i also know that she was somehow a loving being too, the weird part was either one was the truth, but which one was telling me the exact truth. As the image of the 3d model of the front yard now circling the little tiny field, this creature, Mother in spirit, was trying to offer my magic mushrooms, i felt that this was a test to see if i would prefer to have this during my experience, i was trying with all my might to run away from this image of actual magic mushrooms but also from this mother creature, i was scampering too and fro to get away from this being, i could not, in fact the more i did it the powerful her intention to come towards me was, then in spirit i was crying, i was howling like a baby, trying to resist this being, then i had a notion to just surrender to this being in hopefulness and tranquility, and dropped right their in front of her as she came swooping towards me, i just dropped into a feotal position and cried, because i did not know what to do, i gave up my fear and trusted that this being was friendly, but you got to remember either one was a good choice, one was to fear and the other was to embrace this fear by not enging in this fear, and as soon as the moment i decided to let go of this fear, this serpent flew right behind me, and felt her Motherly presence, i can not understand or how to explain this, but this serpent felt like she was not only the Divine presence of Creator but as the representation of all feminine energies, and i felt the presence of her energies as the divine earth Mother as well. I was in tears during my sleep, and then i felt like this tsunami pulling out of my stomach something, i do not know what it was but i had the feeling of weight disappearing from my abdomen. As it did this it lifted my stomach upwards during my sleep and as it did this it pulled my body in a straight line upward and straight out of a dead sleep i awoke with actual tears streaming out of my eyes, i felt happy because i gave up fearing, and surrended to a higher purpose, i believe that this was the divine mother of Prime Creator helping me over come something, but she pulled out of my stomach she would not let me see, but it was something that managed to pull my physical body into an upright position to feel better. Then as i stayed awake i felt compelled to write this story fresh from my dream state. I know this sounds strange, but Divine mother appearing as a grey long snake like serpent, i never feared her presence, then i felt in spirit she liked my Garden i made, and she lifted it up into the heavens and the next thing i was finding a handkerchief to wipe away my tears. In reality i was crying uncontrollably, i do not know i did this, but i think it might be to do with i allowed the divine feminine energy to be of service within my life, i must have somehow suppressed her in my awakening, and now i excepted her presence once more. She is not to be feared i felt her great strength, and her yet smooth and gentle kindness for her creations, that's how i got the impression, she was nurturing her young she bore all those so many billions of years ago. It is this truth, that emanated from the spirit, i think i was fearing the feminine energies, and that's why i did not trust many people anymore, and it was her way of getting in touch with me, and this was how the scenario was meant to play out, it had to be so that i can get the message. Direct and to the point the way i like it. And that's when i realized, the power of Creation much like the front yard of my Dad's house came from the pool of Creation, that the power of Creation has always been their, and it has always came from the divine feminine aspect, and this was what she was pleased about when i did the front and it was a way of her letting me know that she was happy with it, and then it was their that she was also representing my Mother and was my Mother's way of showing me how thankful she is how i dedicated this front yard to her. My own Mother heard my Prayers, and so this dream came about for me to write this. Usually when i talk to Creator i keep thinking he really truly cares what i say and or do but this dream confirmed the opposite of what i was believing at the time.
I hoped you enjoyed this story, i usually dream of things, it's what i normally do.
Jason Steen