I never really post about politics in the least bit, but this is just down right hilarious.

 Apparently everybody is getting in touch with their higher selves (even if it takes a few drinks)

http://www.theonion.com/articles/drunken-ben-bernanke-tells-everyone-at-neighborhoo,21059/

Here is a taste:

SEWARD, NE—Claiming he wasn't afraid to let everyone in attendance know about "the real mess we're in," Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke reportedly got drunk Tuesday and told everyone at Elwood's Corner Tavern about how absolutely fucked the U.S. economy actually is.

Bernanke, who sources confirmed was "totally sloshed," arrived at the drinking establishment at approximately 5:30 p.m., ensconced himself upon a bar stool, and consumed several bottles of Miller High Life and a half-dozen shots of whiskey while loudly proclaiming to any patron who would listen that the economic outlook was "pretty goddamned awful if you want the God's honest truth."

"Look, they don't want anyone except for the Washington, D.C. bigwigs to know how bad shit really is," said Bernanke, slurring his words as he spoke. "Mounting debt exacerbated—and not relieved—by unchecked consumption, spiraling interest rates, and the grim realities of an inevitable worldwide energy crisis are projected to leave our entire economy in the shitter for, like, a generation, man, I'm telling you."

And hell, as long as we're being honest, I might as well tell you that a truer estimate of the U.S. unemployment rate is actually up around 16 percent, with a 0.7 percent annual rate of economic growth if we're lucky—if we're lucky," continued Bernanke, nearly knocking a full beer over while gesturing with his hands. "Of course, if everybody knew that, it would likely cripple financial markets across the entire fucking globe, even in various emerging economies with self- sustaining growth."

You need to be a member of Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community to add comments!

Join Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community

Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • The thing about getting hammered is that it brings out the underlying you and mostly honesty however one must learn to be drunk all the time but without actually drinking. This is the hardest thing for me to do because when i am drunk i speak totally truth but it hurts peoples feelings in the process.

  • It's totally fake guys :)

    http://www.snopes.com/humor/iftrue/bernanke.asp

    • Good chuckle though!

      • He he I agree. Lightened up my day for sure!

  • Anything from The Onion dot come is comedy, parody, silly and not to be taken seriously. Well, take it seriously as it's a lot that SHOULD be happening, but won't, or things were more than thankful haven't happened. :-)
  • im not feelin this if im not mistaken first of the onion is known for disinfo and the photos look photoshopped to me!!!!! I call B.S.
  • Haha I love the onion, very funny!

    If only it was true !!

    "The Onion is an American news satire organization. It is an entertainment newspaper and a website featuring satirical articles reporting on international, national, and local news, in addition to a non-satirical entertainment section known as The A.V. Club." 

  • This is hilarious.  It really made me chuckle, and actually I do believe that he might be expressing what he feels as truth.  Sometimes liquor can act like a truth serum, and to me his divulging that things are truly grim economy wise resonates as truth.  I am sure his words will come back to haunt him when he reads them and thinks.....my god what have I said and done!

  • "And hell, as long as we're being honest..."

    There is nothing I can possibly think of that would make me believe Ben Bernanke to be a person of honesty!

    Thats the point. It rather looks like yet another attemp to draw a doom & gloom future...

This reply was deleted.

Topics by Tags

Monthly Archives

Latest Activity

Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"It's great to see the Chagossians returning to their homeland.......Keir Starmer will be furious....It's a fait accompli to make a claim on a territory, by a human presence, the UN will be unable to deny....

A reversal of modern Labour party…"
2 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"As a kid I always preferred Major Don West...the Jupiter 2 pilot.....Stirling fellow...☺️ He always put Dr. Smith in his place...3...2...1 lift off...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvH4yA_K0A8"
6 hours ago
Movella left a comment on Comment Wall
"Exactly. The ship is prepped and the frequency is way too high for traitors or dead weight. I’m with the Robinsons on this one.😏"
6 hours ago
AlternateEarth left a comment on Comment Wall
"lol-Dr Smith hysterics- whenever the crew traveled to another planet Dr Smith would take sides with any bad aliens and when things became dangerous the traitor Smith would run back to the Robinsons and beg them to take him with them, always at the…"
7 hours ago
Movella left a comment on Comment Wall
"The New Moon in Aquarius today is a massive frequency reset.
Aquarius is the sign of the innovator and the rebel.🌑⚡️

Patterns you may notice:

🔹Breaking the ‘low vibe’ loop: we are being guided to choose a higher perspective of detachment and rise…"
7 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"EV cars are rapidly going out of fashion, because they don't pass muster...."EV Charging Takes Several Hours...!’ : Vauxhall Owner Brings Back Diesel Cars After £19bn EV Cash Blow."
The whole technology rollout has been top down, not bottom up...It…"
7 hours ago
Drekx Omega commented on Drekx Omega's blog post Greta Thunberg's Alarmist Tactics Suit Elite Agendas
"EV cars are rapidly going out of fashion, because they don't pass muster...."EV Charging Takes Several Hours...!’ : Vauxhall Owner Brings Back Diesel Cars After £19bn EV Cash Blow."
The whole technology rollout has been top down, not bottom up...It…"
7 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Communists always fail their people, when in government, local, state or national.....They never get it....People want freedom and they don't want to be taxed to the hilt....Economies grow when business grows.....and people prosper....and why back…"
8 hours ago
More…