I never really post about politics in the least bit, but this is just down right hilarious.

 Apparently everybody is getting in touch with their higher selves (even if it takes a few drinks)

http://www.theonion.com/articles/drunken-ben-bernanke-tells-everyone-at-neighborhoo,21059/

Here is a taste:

SEWARD, NE—Claiming he wasn't afraid to let everyone in attendance know about "the real mess we're in," Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke reportedly got drunk Tuesday and told everyone at Elwood's Corner Tavern about how absolutely fucked the U.S. economy actually is.

Bernanke, who sources confirmed was "totally sloshed," arrived at the drinking establishment at approximately 5:30 p.m., ensconced himself upon a bar stool, and consumed several bottles of Miller High Life and a half-dozen shots of whiskey while loudly proclaiming to any patron who would listen that the economic outlook was "pretty goddamned awful if you want the God's honest truth."

"Look, they don't want anyone except for the Washington, D.C. bigwigs to know how bad shit really is," said Bernanke, slurring his words as he spoke. "Mounting debt exacerbated—and not relieved—by unchecked consumption, spiraling interest rates, and the grim realities of an inevitable worldwide energy crisis are projected to leave our entire economy in the shitter for, like, a generation, man, I'm telling you."

And hell, as long as we're being honest, I might as well tell you that a truer estimate of the U.S. unemployment rate is actually up around 16 percent, with a 0.7 percent annual rate of economic growth if we're lucky—if we're lucky," continued Bernanke, nearly knocking a full beer over while gesturing with his hands. "Of course, if everybody knew that, it would likely cripple financial markets across the entire fucking globe, even in various emerging economies with self- sustaining growth."

You need to be a member of Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community to add comments!

Join Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community

Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • The thing about getting hammered is that it brings out the underlying you and mostly honesty however one must learn to be drunk all the time but without actually drinking. This is the hardest thing for me to do because when i am drunk i speak totally truth but it hurts peoples feelings in the process.

  • It's totally fake guys :)

    http://www.snopes.com/humor/iftrue/bernanke.asp

    • Good chuckle though!

      • He he I agree. Lightened up my day for sure!

  • Anything from The Onion dot come is comedy, parody, silly and not to be taken seriously. Well, take it seriously as it's a lot that SHOULD be happening, but won't, or things were more than thankful haven't happened. :-)
  • im not feelin this if im not mistaken first of the onion is known for disinfo and the photos look photoshopped to me!!!!! I call B.S.
  • Haha I love the onion, very funny!

    If only it was true !!

    "The Onion is an American news satire organization. It is an entertainment newspaper and a website featuring satirical articles reporting on international, national, and local news, in addition to a non-satirical entertainment section known as The A.V. Club." 

  • This is hilarious.  It really made me chuckle, and actually I do believe that he might be expressing what he feels as truth.  Sometimes liquor can act like a truth serum, and to me his divulging that things are truly grim economy wise resonates as truth.  I am sure his words will come back to haunt him when he reads them and thinks.....my god what have I said and done!

  • "And hell, as long as we're being honest..."

    There is nothing I can possibly think of that would make me believe Ben Bernanke to be a person of honesty!

    Thats the point. It rather looks like yet another attemp to draw a doom & gloom future...

This reply was deleted.

Topics by Tags

Monthly Archives

Latest Activity

rev.joshua skirvin commented on rev.joshua skirvin's blog post Thoth: Freeing Yourself from Memory; Channel: Octavia Vasile | Source.
"Infinity, I think he is talking about the past mostly, if we spend to much time in the past, which is usually not very pleasant and is not something we would wont to keep and reviewing them over and over, we strengthen them ,instead of letting them…"
7 minutes ago
Drekx Omega commented on Drekx Omega's blog post One Rebel Star Should Fall From The EU Flag's Circular Constellation and Rise Anew With Greater and Brighter Light
"The supreme court in the UK has made a ruling which supports the rights of British Chagossians, to settle the Chagos islands chain, permanantly and in defiance of that utter traitor, "PM" Starmer and his socialist regime of abominations...
We in…"
1 hour ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"The supreme court in the UK has made a ruling which supports the rights of British Chagossians, to settle the Chagos islands chain, permanantly and in defiance of that utter traitor, "PM" Starmer and his socialist regime of abominations...
We in…"
1 hour ago
Infinity commented on rev.joshua skirvin's blog post Thoth: Freeing Yourself from Memory; Channel: Octavia Vasile | Source.
"I never knew I had to free myself from memory before."
3 hours ago
AlternateEarth left a comment on Comment Wall
"Yes Both dictators had the same nickname except for Napolean it was more affectionate because he would stay close to his men on the battlefield. Hitler was a runner during WW 1, as you know underground comm lines were blown up and soldiers had to…"
12 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"As for the little corporal Adolf, I believe that Napoleon was also described as such, by his men..."Le Petit Caporal" and especially after the Battle of Lodi, 1796..."
13 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Queen Catherine de' Medici did offer and provide Michel with her personal protection, being her court astrologer, in effect, yet the risk was still there and why he used codes, in his works...So that's incorrect...and court politics can change a…"
13 hours ago
Roberto Durante left a comment on Comment Wall
"Nostradamus was not afraid to be taken to an inquisitrion investigation, Catherine de' Medici, the Queen of France (wife of King Henry II), was the royal supporter who protected and admired Nostradamus. She summoned him to Paris in 1555–1556 to draw…"
13 hours ago
More…