I never really post about politics in the least bit, but this is just down right hilarious.

 Apparently everybody is getting in touch with their higher selves (even if it takes a few drinks)

http://www.theonion.com/articles/drunken-ben-bernanke-tells-everyone-at-neighborhoo,21059/

Here is a taste:

SEWARD, NE—Claiming he wasn't afraid to let everyone in attendance know about "the real mess we're in," Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke reportedly got drunk Tuesday and told everyone at Elwood's Corner Tavern about how absolutely fucked the U.S. economy actually is.

Bernanke, who sources confirmed was "totally sloshed," arrived at the drinking establishment at approximately 5:30 p.m., ensconced himself upon a bar stool, and consumed several bottles of Miller High Life and a half-dozen shots of whiskey while loudly proclaiming to any patron who would listen that the economic outlook was "pretty goddamned awful if you want the God's honest truth."

"Look, they don't want anyone except for the Washington, D.C. bigwigs to know how bad shit really is," said Bernanke, slurring his words as he spoke. "Mounting debt exacerbated—and not relieved—by unchecked consumption, spiraling interest rates, and the grim realities of an inevitable worldwide energy crisis are projected to leave our entire economy in the shitter for, like, a generation, man, I'm telling you."

And hell, as long as we're being honest, I might as well tell you that a truer estimate of the U.S. unemployment rate is actually up around 16 percent, with a 0.7 percent annual rate of economic growth if we're lucky—if we're lucky," continued Bernanke, nearly knocking a full beer over while gesturing with his hands. "Of course, if everybody knew that, it would likely cripple financial markets across the entire fucking globe, even in various emerging economies with self- sustaining growth."

You need to be a member of Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community to add comments!

Join Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community

Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • The thing about getting hammered is that it brings out the underlying you and mostly honesty however one must learn to be drunk all the time but without actually drinking. This is the hardest thing for me to do because when i am drunk i speak totally truth but it hurts peoples feelings in the process.

  • It's totally fake guys :)

    http://www.snopes.com/humor/iftrue/bernanke.asp

    • Good chuckle though!

      • He he I agree. Lightened up my day for sure!

  • Anything from The Onion dot come is comedy, parody, silly and not to be taken seriously. Well, take it seriously as it's a lot that SHOULD be happening, but won't, or things were more than thankful haven't happened. :-)
  • im not feelin this if im not mistaken first of the onion is known for disinfo and the photos look photoshopped to me!!!!! I call B.S.
  • Haha I love the onion, very funny!

    If only it was true !!

    "The Onion is an American news satire organization. It is an entertainment newspaper and a website featuring satirical articles reporting on international, national, and local news, in addition to a non-satirical entertainment section known as The A.V. Club." 

  • This is hilarious.  It really made me chuckle, and actually I do believe that he might be expressing what he feels as truth.  Sometimes liquor can act like a truth serum, and to me his divulging that things are truly grim economy wise resonates as truth.  I am sure his words will come back to haunt him when he reads them and thinks.....my god what have I said and done!

  • "And hell, as long as we're being honest..."

    There is nothing I can possibly think of that would make me believe Ben Bernanke to be a person of honesty!

    Thats the point. It rather looks like yet another attemp to draw a doom & gloom future...

This reply was deleted.

Topics by Tags

Monthly Archives

Latest Activity

Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Nice one....now it's over to Stan & Ollie, again....😁

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZMtyM3oLtQ"
1 hour ago
rev.joshua skirvin posted a blog post
 I am Sananda-Jesus,And I come to be with you at this time, to help you remember. It is always about remembering, remembering who you are, how far indeed you have come, what you are here for in terms of the many purposes that you have, the changing…
1 hour ago
Movella left a comment on Comment Wall
1 hour ago
rev.joshua skirvin posted a blog post
 Beloved Ones,As planetary healers, and you all are in your unique and precious way, we prepare to face two of the most important months of these transitional years, before we reach a new self-mastery level in 2027. We are gradually becoming who we…
2 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"Yes, it's a cheeky phallic symbol, floating through space.."
4 hours ago
AlternateEarth left a comment on Comment Wall
"Drexk-any comments regarding Oumuamua?"
12 hours ago
AlternateEarth left a comment on Comment Wall
"Ollie and Stan are the best! Always will be!"
12 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on Comment Wall
"That's the way, bro...Looks like Movella is now working hard on PS...and earlier Elina came through, to let me know that she had completed that promised YT video, about her further explorations of Iran...My particular interest in that country is…"
15 hours ago
More…

                                                                                                     PART ONE

                                                                                            THE SON OF MAN

"NOS AUTEM…

Read more…
Views: 11
Comments: 0