I never really post about politics in the least bit, but this is just down right hilarious.

 Apparently everybody is getting in touch with their higher selves (even if it takes a few drinks)

http://www.theonion.com/articles/drunken-ben-bernanke-tells-everyone-at-neighborhoo,21059/

Here is a taste:

SEWARD, NE—Claiming he wasn't afraid to let everyone in attendance know about "the real mess we're in," Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke reportedly got drunk Tuesday and told everyone at Elwood's Corner Tavern about how absolutely fucked the U.S. economy actually is.

Bernanke, who sources confirmed was "totally sloshed," arrived at the drinking establishment at approximately 5:30 p.m., ensconced himself upon a bar stool, and consumed several bottles of Miller High Life and a half-dozen shots of whiskey while loudly proclaiming to any patron who would listen that the economic outlook was "pretty goddamned awful if you want the God's honest truth."

"Look, they don't want anyone except for the Washington, D.C. bigwigs to know how bad shit really is," said Bernanke, slurring his words as he spoke. "Mounting debt exacerbated—and not relieved—by unchecked consumption, spiraling interest rates, and the grim realities of an inevitable worldwide energy crisis are projected to leave our entire economy in the shitter for, like, a generation, man, I'm telling you."

And hell, as long as we're being honest, I might as well tell you that a truer estimate of the U.S. unemployment rate is actually up around 16 percent, with a 0.7 percent annual rate of economic growth if we're lucky—if we're lucky," continued Bernanke, nearly knocking a full beer over while gesturing with his hands. "Of course, if everybody knew that, it would likely cripple financial markets across the entire fucking globe, even in various emerging economies with self- sustaining growth."

You need to be a member of Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community to add comments!

Join Ashtar Command - Spiritual Community

Email me when people reply –

Replies

  • The thing about getting hammered is that it brings out the underlying you and mostly honesty however one must learn to be drunk all the time but without actually drinking. This is the hardest thing for me to do because when i am drunk i speak totally truth but it hurts peoples feelings in the process.

  • It's totally fake guys :)

    http://www.snopes.com/humor/iftrue/bernanke.asp

    • Good chuckle though!

      • He he I agree. Lightened up my day for sure!

  • Anything from The Onion dot come is comedy, parody, silly and not to be taken seriously. Well, take it seriously as it's a lot that SHOULD be happening, but won't, or things were more than thankful haven't happened. :-)
  • im not feelin this if im not mistaken first of the onion is known for disinfo and the photos look photoshopped to me!!!!! I call B.S.
  • Haha I love the onion, very funny!

    If only it was true !!

    "The Onion is an American news satire organization. It is an entertainment newspaper and a website featuring satirical articles reporting on international, national, and local news, in addition to a non-satirical entertainment section known as The A.V. Club." 

  • This is hilarious.  It really made me chuckle, and actually I do believe that he might be expressing what he feels as truth.  Sometimes liquor can act like a truth serum, and to me his divulging that things are truly grim economy wise resonates as truth.  I am sure his words will come back to haunt him when he reads them and thinks.....my god what have I said and done!

  • "And hell, as long as we're being honest..."

    There is nothing I can possibly think of that would make me believe Ben Bernanke to be a person of honesty!

    Thats the point. It rather looks like yet another attemp to draw a doom & gloom future...

This reply was deleted.

Topics by Tags

Monthly Archives

Latest Activity

rev.joshua skirvin posted a blog post
Posted on 07/20/2026 by EraOfLight — Comments ↓ The Will of God, dear ones, is the first portal one must enter in order to progress in the right direction on the spiritual path. You must be willing to surrender your human ego and human…
59 minutes ago
rev.joshua skirvin posted a blog post
Posted on 07/20/2026 by EraOfLight —  Comments ↓ Greetings, Dear Ones, I am Kryon of Magnetic Service.We’re going to call this a mid-year update in the dimensional shift information. Yes, dimensional shift. Now if you have missed any of the…
1 hour ago
Justin89636 commented on Justin89636's blog post History Of Events In This Galaxy And On Earth
"Glad you guys like this blog. So much has definitely gone down in this galaxy and on this planet."
13 hours ago
Andromedaner Z commented on Justin89636's blog post History Of Events In This Galaxy And On Earth
"great summary Justin, I somehow didn't notice this blog at the time you posted it, it is only now through Drekx's reply I noticed it. I didn't read Sheldan's books but your blog answers a lot of questions I had, thank you!"
14 hours ago
Love & Joy posted a discussion
     The Beacon  The Beacon Like a beacon in the night … one whose inner light shines unimpeded stands out in a crowd.  You all carry wounds, for humans hurt each other, intentionally or not.  But there are those among you who know that the human…
15 hours ago
Drekx Omega commented on Justin89636's blog post History Of Events In This Galaxy And On Earth
"A Sumerian scribe provides DETAILED descriptions, as to what to look for and test for, when a shape-shifting skin-walker is encountered, attempting to infiltrate your society...
He lists several observable characteristics, along with basic instinct…"
22 hours ago
Drekx Omega left a comment on New Members Lounge
"A Sumerian scribe provides DETAILED descriptions, as to what to look for and test for, when a shape-shifting skin-walker is encountered, attempting to infiltrate your society...
He lists several observable characteristics, along with basic instinct…"
22 hours ago
AlternateEarth posted a blog post
 Obama will need to meet with a grand jury-he directed elction fraud! Bowne Report: The So-Called "Deep State" Election Cover Up Explodes - Alex Jones Live
22 hours ago
More…