Spiritual Forum

Hello to you, my fellow consciousness, you who are reading my words. I ask, with passionate concern, how are you feeling? What are you perceiving? Can you feel that the sense of time is literally gone? Monday turns into Friday in 1 day. It feels like 3 days have passed when it's actually been 3 weeks. I'm still processing new years eve of 2013 and we're heading towards 2015 in less than 4 months. When 2 days passes, it feels like 2 years have passed...It feels surreal.

I'm no channeler nor do I claim to be, all my knowledge and information is from within me and a result of my own philosophy, investigation and logic. Most who have read my past posts, knows that I've had my fair share of struggle, so I'm not here to give you the "everything is awesome" speech. But...As I've said before, I'm just 23. I lived a "normal sheep life" until the age of 18. When I was a kid, I used to always pray (when I was a Christian) to get the chance to meet God in this lifetime, I wanted exactly the meeting to find place in this incarnation, I didn't have the patience to die first. My entire life, from the youngest age I can remember, even though I've been lost 99.9 % of the time, I've ALWAYS felt a God presence around me, yet very far away at the same time. I just knew, that a great power was watching over everything. I didn't know what that was(I just imagined a man with white beard on the clouds like most) until I spontaneously one summer day in 2009 took LSD.

I than understood, I fully felt the "knowingness", the "sureness", that the God presence was my higher self, a self that had been locked away from me, hidden within my 97% of what mainstream science calls "junk DNA". I saw vivid visions of Leonardo Da Vinci's "Man".

Than the "Man" turned inside out and the Universe appeared, while seeing visions of the Universe, information about my oneness with the Cosmos, about me being the Cosmos, about how the fabric of reality worked, about consciousness and how one perceives, it all was "downloaded" within me and within seconds, even though it may have been hours, the visions of the Cosmos turned inside out again and Da Vinci's "Man" appeared once more. It went from "Man" to the Universe and back to "Man" by turning itself inside out every time it changed. I instantly interpreted that as: The Universe is within man and man is within the Universe and it made perfect sense, but I just couldn't grasp the idea of how this was being told to me, it was all within me, I was seeing this in my hallucinations. How could my consciousness produce such fantastic visuals by itself, where did all of this come from? In what part of me was this kept stored? I know I took substances but the brain naturally produces DMT which gives you the same hallucinations, so what was I experiencing? How could I so vividly with 2 tiny drops of liquid substances create such an extra terrestrial state of being. I than instantly understood that my mind is way more powerful than I've been told...I didn't get a feeling, I UNDERSTOOD.

I base my awakening solely on this experience and I've come to terms that, that was the God I was waiting for and praying for all my life to meet without me having to die. It freed me from the chains of total darkness, but life was still dark. That night and the following day on, a spark was ignited within me that turned into EXTREME HUNGER for knowledge, truth seeking and peace keeping. But the more conscious I became, the more darkness revealed itself which now makes perfectly sense. One is only fully conscious when being totally aware of not only the light, but also the dark. Over the past 1 year, I've faced my ego on a high scale. My ego have been in my face holding a very tight grab on my nuts, in terms of CRAZY, SEVERE anger management issues, EXTREME fear of loss of anything and pathetic, foolish lust. On the peak of everything, I extended my credit card and took off to Pokhara, Nepal for 1 month. (Got back 12th of August which feels like 3-4 days ago). It was the weirdest, strangest, most bizarre action I've ever taken in my life. So sudden, so irrelevant to everything. My journey to Nepal is a whole subject for itself, I won't go in to that, but...my journey to Nepal was my first journey to that region of the planet ever, not to mention I went alone.

I can sense that we are in a much higher, vibrant dimension than a year ago or two, call it the "5th dimension" if you will, I'm more comfortable just calling it a higher dimension since I really don't know what to call it, but we are way passed what some people call "3rd and 4th dimension", at least, that's how I feel and perceive it. It's like I can feel things happening, before it happens. Not psychic, More of, feeling what you desire to manifest and than actually somehow know that, that is what you're gonna get..Like, I can feel the waves I send out. I SERIOUSLY get tears over the smallest, emotional scenes in a movie or story or what ever. I watched a video on You tube with 3 random dudes meeting each other on the street and singing. It was fantastic and all they sang was "tell'em that I just don't know", but I kind of silently cried and got choked up over the beauty and harmony of it all, the whole set up and synchronization on behalf of the Universe, than caught on camera for humans all over the world to see. It was just so graceful and amazing to witness such blossom when 2 or 3 humans come together and express creativity.

I get the weirdest, most bizarre, lucid dreams, each with stories and events just beyond me...I'm in awe and amazement during my entire dream sessions . I usually remember them all when I wake up, sometimes in vivid detail. For example, I'm Persian, but I'm born and raised in Norway, I've been to Iran 14 times over a period from 2000 to 2008. I've never dreamt of Iran, before the recent last 12-24 months. And In my current dreams, the few times I've been in Iran, I always have star-ships coming down close or passing by with speed in purple or green/yellow colours...I once dreamt of a building, that was a gigantic flower in a landscape just like the one in Pandora, Avatar movie. Everything was luminescent and glowy and jelloy..it looked like jelly, but it wasn't jelly. Anyway, it was very soothing. The flower building was some kind of a nightclub only much more....fairytale-ish and classy. Allot of beings and individuals socializing and just relaxing and enjoying the scenery...

I constantly get sudden flashes of shadows in the corners of my eye, sudden flashes of purple, just coming and going in an instant, not long enough to observe, but long enough to notice. I'm doing things in my life I NEVER imagined doing, like getting into business and creating my own company and doing what I WANT TO DO: I used to curse and drag myself out of bed, being depressed as hell leaving off to work in what ever miserable place I worked. I now, wake up 2 hours before my actual get up time by myself and I dance all the way to work. The best thing is, I work with my 2 best friends. With that said, I'm not happy. Nothing feels like joy, yes I dance on my way to work but I have twice as much anxiety and stress just poisoning almost my every moment of breath at the same time. I feel heavy, I feel very burdened and guilty, I don't know how to actually forgive myself. Before, I would just say "let it go" and that was that. But currently, it just wont back off, yet I've never felt any clearer in my life. What I'm trying to say, is that even though the anxiety is there in its fullest form, I sense I'm learning to just observe the emotion and not identifying with it and its all happening by itself. I'm even witnessing the process of witnessing the "not-identifying-with-my-darker-emotions" part, It sounds like a mess but I can't describe it any better. 

It's like a super power, giving me the ease I need just right before i feel I'm choking on my anxiety and I'm kind of learning to control it. I also feel the fabric of reality changing from solid to being fluid and bendable(It sounds really shallow and stupid when written in primitive words, I know, but the feeling and the sense of it is there just like feeling the warmth from an oven or a bonfire. I've also developed an intense intolerance towards deceit, cheating and lies ...Is that just me? Is all of this just me? Anyone with similar experiences? I like to look at my posts as a "once in a while rapport on my current status on planet Earth" and I also truly crave to read what other souls are experiencing in these times of purification. But I rarely find "rapports" from other people, only posts from people who always seem to know what is going on and what the solutions are and that everything is peaches. What ever that is, I guess it will only work for them. I create my own stream of reality and truth with peace and love as its foundation, nothing else matters. 

Nothing exists except atoms and empty space; everything else is opinion.

- Democritus.

I think science can back that ;)