(Disclaimer: This discussion is in no way designed to mock certain beliefs or religions, but it is designed to mock how we behave with them.)
With the aid of our Lord and Saviour, The Chosen Bun (Amayonnaise) and a random word generator, I would like to clear up some rather outstanding misconceptions on the reality of the "Universal Truth" and "Universal Laws". We offer our peace, love and hypoderma as we walk you through these gross misunderstandings and present the "real truth" so you all can get over yourselves and find your inner necessitarianism. Only by reading and accepting our truth as the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the big kahuna truth, will you all stop fighting and start being productive with your lives by directing all your worship to our Lord and Saviour, he who only can be named by me, The Chosen Bun (Amayonnaise).
First thing first and it shalt not be second, for thy being second as a first would make thou the most misguided of sumos. Thus we establish the first truth as first being marked as the first day our Lord Saviour, The Chosen Bun (Amayonnaise) projected the first thought concept of man. Now what you must realize is that he did indeed create you in his image, so he scrapped his first thought and made some small changes. In order to become closer with his one high wholesomeness, The Chosen Bun (Amayonnaise), we must recognize the illusion we are perceiving with our physical eyes. Once we recognize these Universal Truths, we will rise beyond the stars on the back of a strawberry poptart cat into oneness with our Creator.
Thus the first thing of the first thought of the first truth of the first day after the first change you should realize is that your hands are indeed actually magical dolphins which fart rainbows. Remember, you may not challenge or question the all-one one, as he is too singular for your dual mind to comprehend. Thus by feeding our dolphins and abiding by our all-one one's Universal Laws, we shall attain perfect unity with the all oneness of the all-one one. Our Lord and Saviour, The Chosen Bun (Amayonnaise) has advised me of the commandments, which are as follow;
1. Thou shall abide by these laws and have no other Lord and Saviour before The Chosen Bun (Amayonnaise).
2. Thou were given a male dolphin (left hand) and a female dolphin (right hand) as nature intended. Thus your left dolphin shall never shake with another left dolphin, nor a right dolphin with another right dolphin, which is evil as is practiced our enemy, the dark lord.
3. Thou left dolphin shall never meet someone else's female dolphin unless the left dolphin has indeed first married their right dolphin, and likewise for a female dolphin.
4. Thou shall not seek to find facts which contradict any of The Chosen Bun's (Amayonnaise) laws and truths or be branded as a heretic and forced to a life of swashbuckling pirate misadventures, worshiping the dark lord, Flying Spaghetti Monster.
5. Thou shall go forth and convert the masses thus they be saved from the inconvenience of having to decide things with their own free will.
6. Thou shall insist that they believe you, or else be damned to law #7
7. Thou shall not make for yourself an idol, lest ye be cursed with the Beiber Fever
8. Remember the first day, as not the second but first as the first day, of the first thought of the first concept of the first change of man. Don't expect any freeloading holidays though.
9. Thou shall not make wrongful use of his wholesomeness's name, as he is a grammar Nazi, for the Chosen Bun (Amayonnaise) will not acquit anyone who misspells his name.
10. Now go forth and multiply your dolphins.
Replies
you simply have it all wrong, it is actually my little pony, and you know this to be true, and you simply will not admit the truth in front of these believers before you,
I should warn you all, the Strawberry Poptart Cat is the symbol of the true evil, it emanates evil annoying sounds from itself, do not let your ears hear such sound lest you become victim to is excruciating annoyingness, horribly you may even have your avatar image changed by such strenuous effects
LOL totally 'Fantastic' finally someone who thinks on the same comic wave lengh.. everyones been so serious in here,and being new to this site.. Ive just sat back and watched it all shaking my head in disbelief..in a sense terrified to speak..so in reality people in here believe it or not are in fact placing and instilling a type of fear over people to not be free to voice themselves without being judged and persecuted all in one breath,this shouldn't be felt but its the truth..the feelings of power struggles and ego based conflict has been terrible to witness and feel..so its wonderful to see that there is still those living for the NOW and use humour to lighten this negative cloud over the site..Thankyou Reikara.~Lefevre~
With Lord Amayonnaise's holy blessing, I hereby baptise this blog, in the name of the Dolphin, the Bun and the Strawberry Poptart Cat, forever and ever....amen...!!
;-)
Thou shalt have no pastas before him......!! lol Hari Pastrami......!!
I love it...Now this is how it should always be, us togerher laughing and smiling and feeling wonderful... Certainly needed this week.......let the festivities begin....
Love this graphic....perfect with your comment......lol
Why, thankyou for your kind approval, Marique.................I beam back at you and just love it when we are all in a state of festive joy here...LOL too...!!
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