I'm having a major breakdown now and I'm most likely to get into a mental hospital on monday. This will be the third time that this has happened..
My situation is this.. I'm in telepathic contact with some beings/spirits.. They are scaring me with the fact that they have taken me over completely and can do what they want with me.. This is already true, as they got in contact with me 30 mins before I was to fire the fireworks into the year 2000, It started with dizziness so I had to sit down.. It was like lightning coming from a clear sky.. I got terribly ill and had to travel home.. On the way home I was very sick and scared.. After I got home, I was afraid to die, and thought I had every disease I could think of.. I was sick like this laying in bed for 2 months.. Had to take a year of school extra to finish the study after that.. After the two months of laying in bed, I had two weeks where I don't understand the day today that I lived through, I was very suicidal.. Then after that I moved.. I lived alone in a part of a house that I rented.. My economy was terrible and I had anxiety and panic attacks for two years.. Then is slowly got over..
Then my clairvoyant uncle invited me to a theta healing course 2008 I think, I attended and learned basic telepathy, and discovered that there was someone to talk to there in the spirit realm.. I also read the book Bringers of the Dawn in 2006.. The healer told me I should not talk to the fourth existence plane like I did, but go directly to god source instead.. I did not listen of-course and after 6 months, they tricked me and sent pain to my body.. It hurt like hell and when I was trying to go to sleep, they made me jump every-time I almost reached sleeping state.. They did this for more then 3 days and nights, and I could not stand anymore.. So I told my dad we need to get to the hospital..
After I attended the Theta healing.. I got a message from the beings.. They told me the following: We just want to give you the experiences you need!" Then after they tricked me and I was terrified and in pain.. My dad drove me to the hospital.. Then they decided that I was to take a taxi to a mental ward.. So I did, but these beings had control over me, so they made me walk around the whole hospital, including the area where people is operated and the organ storage room.. Then they led me out and I took a taxi to my aunt (she lived with my uncle), then they drove me back and got me into the hospital.. At the time when they (the beings) where showing me around in the hospital before I was to take the taxi back and get driven back, they told me another message "the experiences are the most important thing with life"..
Then after I was in the mental ward.. I was on heavy medication and still, they have 100% contact with me and even channeled something.. I was bored, so I thought maybe it was a good idea to start a puzzle.. So I brought a puzzle from the cabinet or whatever and started laying down the puzzle.. But there was something strange.. I took one piece down after the other in perfect line without even trying.. And after a while I have done the whole skies of the puzzle.. People who saw the sky afterwords wondered how I did it, because that was the hardest piece to do.. Sky is very similar color..
Ok, so.. I got out of the mental ward a few weeks after, and was on low medication.. I was out maybe a almost a week before I got so much anxiety I've never had before and went straight in again..
I was on 3 different places in a time-span of about a year.. Now I will tell the bit to today..
I got ill a week ago, and feel very sick.. They beings scare me that they have all control over me and my reality is shifting from bad to good and good to bad several times a day.. Yesterday I visited my doctor and tried to get into a new mental ward that I'm to be placed in since I live close to it.. But there where no free beds. So we tried other places.. None there either.. So I'm stuck at home, with overwhelming fear and suffering.. And my question is.. Are these beings god source? I know that all beings are of the source but is this the source it self.. And if so, why are they bothering me..
Well the reason why I shift between negative/positive is because I have learned something.. That to get rid of fears I need to face them.. Or accept them.. And then they disappear.. Well I think that that is what these beings are doing.. Because they have full control over me if they want, but I might be that they trick me.. They scare the hell out of me and most of what they say is not true.. I'm really scared, and I'm wondering, how do I get rid of these.. They are probably bound to me with even sexual energies.. Please help me! I beg of you! Are you a clear clairvoyant, what can you see?
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Thanks Olijah and everyone..
I'm back home from the mental institution and the medication did not work.. I still have these beings or whatever they are..! But I think it is correct that I experience ascension symptoms! Is there any way these beings can prevent me from the process of ascending? They can control me if they want and they sometimes do, but they have only given me fearful thoughts and feelings so far.. I sometimes get this frequency tone in my ears, often after thinking about something.. The beings claim that they are not bad and they are not lizard people, but if they are, they probably wouldn't tell me?
I got a dream before some of this happend.. It was about a huge black spider.. And the spider attacked some rats in a chair.. So I took a book and killed the spider.. But then it re-incarnated and was now colored angry red on the back.. and it was attacking me.. Then I smashed it again, but it didn't die.. So I tore it until it died.. Then I connected with it while it was dead and told the spider to be nice, and that if it would leave me and the rats be, I would not attack it anymore.. Then it reincarnated and was nice.. :-p There was also a very nice and kind lion on a weird platform before all this.. And a dog that peed!
There is one thing I want to mention.. Whenever I get scared about something.. Or I'm trying to do something.. These beings or some other power force me to experience just what I'm scared of.. For instance if I try to ground myself by walking in nature, because I'm scared that the bad beings get more control over me if I'm not grounded..
What happens is that I become less grounded while walking in nature.. And very scared about it.. But after a while I accept it, and the next time I walk in nature I become somewhat grounded.. So they kind of force me into meeting all my biggest fears.. And it seems like they have to hurry.. Because the fears are coming more rapidly now.. And they are bigger then ever before.. It's extremely scary!
If I'm scared about physical implants from negative ET's, they trick me into believing that I get such an implant.. But then I find out.. Oh.. It was not dangerous at all.. And of cause I didn't get an implant at all..!
This is all good and that.. But I don't like to let some unknown being control me.. And I have no ability to send them away.. I have used my free will.. I have asked that they leave.. I have called for protection from the archangels and God/Source, and my guides and angels.. The only thing that happens when I do this is that I get the feeling that my call for help is not heard and that there is no way to get help.. So I kind of give up..
Is it common for spirit beings to be able to control my feelings, thoughts, block the release of some feelings (I can sense it), tell me lies all the time, they claim it is to release miasms (blockages in the emotional body). They also commonly say things like: "we own you now" "we are going to get you"..
And by the way.. There was an accident at the hospital.. One day before I got out.. Someone was killed with a knife inside the hospital.. I'm not so scared about it, as I believe my destiny is going to happen.. So if something happens, it is meant to be..! I also don't mourn so much.. As I know that life after the physical is not so bad.. :)
Anyways! I think I have to re-take control somehow.. With my will or whatever mentioned before in other peoples reply.. I feel kind of powerless to achieve such a goal! Even if they are good beings trying to remove my miasms, they should not be in control over me like they are now! And for some reason, they allow me to type this post..! :-P
I must add however, that I do more loving actions then before..! When I was in the hospital, I was kind to everybody and helped the employees with some tasks that I was able to do..
I also visited a medium while in hospital.. He claimed that negative beings does not exist and humans are the most negative you can find.. And he told me that one of my guides or angels (from Holland, which is where my fathers mother came from) claimed that everything I'm experiencing with these beings is just fantasy and my imagination..! I think not! It's probably a safe belief system to have.. As you create your reality according to your beliefs.. But I'm very unfortunate to know and believe in to much negative..! :-(
Hi Ivan. I found the site the other day and saw your entry. I wrote a reply after I read it. Im sending it now. Hope it still Icarries the light that we had at that point. Hope it makes sense.
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"Life is a self-fulfilling prophecy with no fixed future; we create as we go. People with a lot of fear in their minds will create a temporary illusion until they understand that it's all projected from their beliefs about how things should be. Life is new in every moment.
Entertaining your mind with heavy thoughts and flooding it with negativity is just draining your energy. The mind loves to dive into "dramas" of every kind, and as I have said many times, we will not understand the greatness of Love and who we are until we let go of judgement and preconceived ideas of how things should be unfolding." Ben Arion
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Dear Ivan
I had a similar entrance into the light. I was very scared. II felt like I couldnt protect myself from them and i needed my friend to protect me. I'd throw the covers over my head at age 26 and feel unsafe unless I my Indian soul mate - my ex fiance was with me. I thought I wasn’t able to protect myself. I was just inexperienced in the spirtitual world. I can protect myself and I don’t see anything at all as being capable of hurting me. I always fight with love. Negativity doesn’t get you anywhere when you have to fight the devil. Not that I believe in the devil, as that just creates him.
I think that you are taking the divine light in the wrong sense. You need to see everything that comes to you from light as being good and filled with love. You need to take a little less caution. Take everything less serious. And look at everything on the side of love. Let them be around you to see what they do, and know that you are allowing them. Just go with it and if it gets evil, then stop. Only go with the ghosts that are nice J and respect the angels of light. As for guides, I don’t really have any guides, but guides are there to help you progress in your spiritual journey and your life on earth. I don’t have guides as I don’t let anything but light angels tell me what to do ;).
On that plane, you need to care about WHAT they are … they are light beings. They are Light. They aren’t bad. They are good. Light is love. It is good. This is how you should view the realm you are entering. Sounds like they are most likely are trying to tell you something. And that’s why you are being led around by them and shown things. They are trying to make your life easier. They may be trying to find a way out of where you are about to go. They don’t like you suffering. If you think they are no good for you, you can make them go if you want. If you need strong loving light, just ask the angels to protect you. Ask Raphael or Michael to come if you feel scared. The angels are always there if you need them. The angels will make the spirits go if they are not very good entities.
You also need to care about WHO you are. And that is a great guy with a good heart who needs some help in light. There is no reason why they want to take you over or cause you harm. If they are making you do bad things, just deny them. Ask them why you need to do it before you do it. You must always remember that you are the creator.
I don’t see spirits as being evil or capable of doing me any harm. I have the power. I am the Creator. If I come across a spirit who is not very nice, I will help the spirit if I can. I don’t need to or have to. I just do it because they are not meant to be bad.
Make sure you never fight anything bad with bad. Always be the more loving person. Say I AM STRONGER as I am all love. Then surround yourself with feelings of love and white light. Don’t get upset as anger creates negative energy and makes you weak. You cant beat evil with evil. Love always wins.
Each morning, say ‘the love and light of God surrounds me and protects me’. Say a protection prayer to help you feel safe in your day.
You’ll get through it. Try and stay focussed on one world. Don’t get caught up in too many worlds. As when that happens, we end up insane. We get pulled and pushed into many directions with voices telling us to come this way, go that way. The only real solution to that is… always do what is good and what is right. As long as you always remain true to God and love and be good, and know that this is the world you should be in, you can stop all the other worlds from trying to make you sway their way. Trust your heart when in trouble. And say ‘I know what is right, I know what is good. I will trust my heart and my head’. Insanity does not exist if you stay focussed on one world of good.
I’m not the worlds greatest angel on earth, but I cope with humans the best I can . I’m a lot better at light than earth. Its loving and true and innocent and is what I like to be .
You’ll be fine. Just take a whole new look at the world. Do it now. Don’t break again, A china doll will crak if you hit her once, twice and she'll break, three times and she’ll smash!
Im glad I could find an answer for you. Thankyou for sharing your problem. It has helped me also. I’ve only been spiritual for 8 years. I started like you. I learnt everything on my own and had to do it fast. I was told by a clairvoyant that the learning curve was very steep for me when everything started happening. She said I would possibly end up in a mental institution. I haven’t yet and I won’t ever let myself. I know that health is the most important thing. If you don’t have it, you don’t have anything, so don’t worry yourself to sickness. Its not worth it. Life on Earth is pretty amazing. Its fun J. Challenging.
Regards
Olijah
But I must ask, should I give in on the fear or should I resist it? Resisting it solves nothing, but if I surrender I fear I'm losing myself? But I have some experiences that after surrendering the fear is gone forever..? So do I have to surrender my power and my will to some unknown beings to get free?
If you are afraid pray to St. Michael the Arc angel and ask for protection. You may also want to ask the other Arc angels for help as well. They have a standing request to protect me, and they do. You may want to study about Sun Gazing. It needs to be done very, very carefully, and to precise directions; otherwise you can burn your eyes. This practice is said to clear any mental issues we may have over time. If I were you, I would begin with just a few seconds a day, very early, before sunrise, and stop. Try it just once a day, and no more. Do not do it when past sunrise.
You know, we have spirit guides, and our own voice of reason inside of ourselves. If you remain good, and you control negative thoughts; and think beautiful things, negatives don't want to be near you anymore. Did you know that? They go away. Start thinking about all beautiful things, speak beautiful words, and see what happens. This takes time to accomplish, but you can do it. Start with a walk outside, and take a close look at gorgeous flowers, and trees, and beautiful birds and photograph them with your mind. Try it, it's free, and let's see what happens. In the mean time, I'm sending you unconditional LOVE. We are all in this together, and I understand your fear because we are programmed from birth in this world; to believe we are separated from God, when we are not. You are God. We are the ONE Heart. Do not be afraid of what you are. What I see, is that you are good. You are ONE.
Lorraine
Hi Thomas...
Put your Will before all of that...to take the control of your life back...
Practice yoga....concentrate yourself about you and your soul a little bit....learn to communicate with your soul...
Your soul...your inner you can teach you to remember things that you forget about them...and give you all you need to protect yourself...and understand what happen to you...
Think positive...and dedicate yourself to a high purpose and do good...and you will beat this thing..
I know you can...love from your hearth it is the key...and can do many beautiful things...
I think it is your time to be Awaken..
Lord Enlil
DEAR IM-MY-ENEMY
SIMPLICITY IS THE ANSWER
You have to take control of the situation if you are mentally able to do so.
I myself have had experiences being an out of control medium and the fear that comes along with it. I urge you to do what you can to take care of yourself, and if you cannot take care of yourself have a trusted family member or friend help you take care of yourself........
You need to ground your energy, get out in nature, call on ARCHANGEL MICHEAL, and pray, employ the tools of the psychic trade, and also get your mind off of the situation, hang out with friends and family, do a hobbie
IN OTHER WORDS SERIOUS SELF CARE FOR YOU MY BROTHER!!!!
I have been an out of control medium and the fear that I have delt with was unreal. I had a nightmare and then I watched as that nightmare became precognitive. I watched as the nightmare became real.....scary stuff......but in looking at the situation I did not take care of myself instead I let the fear of the dream take over and that was all I could focus on and I ended up in such a panic, which was not helpful..;)
blessings to you and I hope this response finds you well, walks
It's really hard to let the energy flow when there are such scary energies.. And I'm having a really hard time making myself free.. I thank all of you who send me prayers! Thank you so much! :-)
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