Introduction To Myself

I guess you could call me a "questioning" individual as in GLBTQ. My goal in life is to make some contribution to relieving human suffering using my interest in molecular biological research or I might like to make some contribution to advancing human knowledge of some medically or biologically related issue. Doing both would be OK.

I am 56, male, upper-middle class origin. I continue to live an upper-middle class lifestyle though I suffer from mental problems. Specifically depression and OCD (although the OCD has been well-controlled for 11 years now due to medication. I also had a year or so of cognitive behavioral therapy which may have helped also.

I do question everything although this could be some kind of boast and I am loathe to boast--usually.

Actually,  I should edit that goal to say my goal in life is to be happy.

I really liked Mr. BenArion's blog about the dark side. I am trying to figure out how to think about and what to do about my dark side. What is a dark side? Is it my limited cigarette smoking? (Of course it is, but should I stop doing it?) I also noted BenArion's comments about the duality of life. I agree that there is a duality about almost everything--except maybe God, if she he it exists).

I have tried meditation. It doesn't work for me. But I see that that AshtarCommand employs ideas that are associated with meditation and I embrace them. My only question about meditation and duality is, Is there a god? I think that the fact that this web site talks about everything in the universe ultimately being ONE does NOT necessarily imply that there is a God.

I did some drugs until I was 32 or 33. Pot and LSD. Now I only do coffee and cigarettes.

 

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Replies

  • Welcome to the site! Search with an open mind and and an open heart and you will find what you are searching. Follow your heart and you will be led to whatever you are seeking. Are there any things that you really wanted to do for some time now but you still haven't done it yet? It is time to listen to your heart and do whatever it is that you have urge to do. But just make sure that your urge doesn't harm other people. :-)
    • Thank you for replying. I'm still trying to find out whether dark side urges are OK to give in to even when they don't seem to hurt other people. Like I mentioned in my introduction, smoking cigarettes which might hurt me (well it could hurt others too, but mainly it hurts me). Just cause it (mostly) doesn't hurt others, does that make it OK?
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