Is Love and Obsession the same thing? or does Love lead to Obsession? many people say they love someone but they don't mean it, they only say it because they feel they're expected to, so this may be the reason why it is difficult to say what Love is, or what it does to people...
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I don't know how to explain this but a while ago I "became in love" with a girl as it's supposed to be named. And I don't know if there was an energetic bond or some chemicals that made me feel that way I did.
I just felt that the time abscent of her presence made me feel literally sick. She was in my thoughs allmost constantly, and if I started to think about something else and then back to her it felt like a JOLT of electricity in my heart when she popped up again. Sadly for me it was kind of one-sided I think or I am a really shy guy so I didn't take it any further, but it took at least two week for this bond to entirely dissappear, even though today I like her a lot I don't feel that connected and in that state that "She is the only perfect girl in the world" anymore.
Is this called love? I just felt I wanted sooo badly to be near her, and when I wasn't it just really hurt :P. I bet this is a nice thing if you use this bond to get together, but unfortunatley for me I had to endure pain and go the hard way by being abscent and let it fade.
What are your thoughts on this?
I know how that is, and i've gone through it quite a few times myself... it's like when it's been years since you've met a girl that you can have any meaningful conversation with. and then when you finally meet one, all you can think about is how happy you can be together. but then you think all the strong and instense emotions that come to surface would be too much and might make her uncomfortable, so you push them down and hide them, also in a time like this Rejection would probably devastate you, so you would rather not even try than to risk being rejected, or even misunderstood. :P
Ohh you absolutely read me like a book there xD. The mind really screws with you in periods like that "Shall I tell her something? No then it'll be too obvious, I'll just lay low" then you regret things for not taking steps etc. and the worst part of it all "What does she think of me? What if she have no feelings at all for me"
It's this that are blockages, you might call it low self-esteem. Combine that with being quite shy to the nature as well, then you are in my position. I have never had a relationship in my entire life (21 years) and the reason why is quite obvious, somehow I don't focus to improve on that I just make up excuses like I don't look attractive enough or something that lame..
Thought I don't feel like I NEED a relationship to survive, though it would be nice sometimes, I bet it can be nice being single as well sometimes to be alone too hehe. But when you get this unbreakable bond to someone and you just feel the only option is to suppress it its AGONY in pure form. But somehow you prefer that instead of what would happen if you showed your feelings, strange huh?
lol yeah I suppose, I'm shy also, and I'm very self absorbed, so I'm always stuck in my own world thinking about other stuff, then when I see a girl I like I keep thinking about what I should say instead of actually saying something, the it becomes too late and I'm like "oh whatever". also I'm rarely in a good mood, and I can't flirt with a girl if I'm not in a good mood. it's very tricky
Indeed :) Too many social norms in our subconcious that shouldn't be there xD. I wish I could erase the "What if?" and just do things I feel like instead of holding myself back. I have a strong feeling I'm going to be one of those looking back at my life and asking "Why didn't I do this / that when I had the chance to?" which I allready do today ;p.
It's pretty simple actually, you got nothing to lose. Why is that so hard to realize? It's like a barrier blocking you from doing certain things :s.
sometimes it's just a matter of "is it worth the effort" because if something is going to end up aggrivating me in the long run then I won't do it. I also feel like if I was under different social circumstances then I would be more social and talkative. another problem is when noone wants to talk about what I want to talk about... lol
I dont feel love and obsession are the same thing, because love is free of attachments ... it doesnt attach itself to anyone... love allows freedom... ITS NOT obsessive...
its like how source/ god/ universe... allows us to be free of attachments... that IS true LOVE from source/ god/ divine...
the 3d world has no idea of what real love is.
Most human beings confuse Love with attachment. That is they become attached to the object of their love. Love is not attachment, love is always free and without demands, conditions or expectations. Obsession on the other hand is a form of attachment. Love has nothing to do with obsession. When you truly love someone you do not need to cling to them or be attached to them. Genuine love means that you will always feel love for the person no matter where they are or where they go, and you wish for their highest happiness, even if that means you are apart from them. Yes people who truly love may be alone, but that is because they have no need to cling to others for emotional gratification. They experience love in every moment of every day, because it is in everything and everyone, it is everywhere and there is no need to grasp after it. There is no separation in this vibration. There is no other. There no ego. Only and endless ocean of love. Most relationships are based on desirous attachment. Love is where you accept everything and everyone for what it is, and can be one with anything that exists, because in actuality you share the same heart. There is no need therefore to possess, control, make demands or have expectations, because you feel one with the Love that is in everything without limitation. Love frees you therefore, it does not bind you to any person or any thing.
Having said all that, Love mixed with attachment is not necessarily a bad thing. It is a learning experience, and in some cases can be beneficial for all involved. Obsession on the other hand, always leads to a bad place, one way or another.
I found something that I thought was interesting... http://intro2psych.wordpress.com/2009/05/12/love-obsession-and-chem...
If one is romantically attached to the mother, one will be more likely to hunt for both the mother and the child. The obsessive nature of love that...
and it stops there because my school blocked the website, but it makes me think that a man in love and obsessed with a woman will risk his life to hunt for food and protect her from harm, he would feel the need to do whatever it takes to do this, but If a man says he "Loves" a woman, but is not really obsessed with her, he would hesitate, and he wouldn't feel the survival instincts as strongly....
I guess that depends on how much you "love" this person or thing. For example; I love the color Blue, but I don't paint my house blue, or my rooms or buy everything "blue". Therefore, I love blue but am not obsessed with it.
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