New Girl

I'm really hoping to find/meet someone with similar spiritual experiences/views/understandings as myself. I never heard of the whole starseed/lightworkers thing until recently when someone that I was attempting to explain universal dynamics to, stopped me and showed me a youtube video on starseeds and indigos and ect. I was thrilled at first at the notion of meeting people like me to share ideas to increase our spiritual/scientific understandings. Currently, I fill more isolated than before hearing about this sort of stuff weeks ago, because a inherent flaw/limitation in the human psyche is the need to belong and that can manifest in desire for any sort of group mainstream or 'occult'. I find that most people are likely just sensitive and insecure in some way that has left them feeling like an outcast and this 'movement' has thus became more of a support group for people like that. I'm sorry if I seem pointed in tone, as I'm really the sweetest most sympathetic yet truthful person lost people will ever meet, I'm beginning to see. (most people have a limited perception on truth and the paradoxes within most languages and figures of speech and human intention vs spoken words) So I'm not so sure about all of this starseed stuff as relates to the highly emotionalized unicorn dust aspects. I do strongly know that my soul/lifeforce is tremendously older than, most anyone I've ever met, and I say this because my wisdom is based on the simple law of truth and the unattainable goal to be "Good/likeGod" which together combine in my mind, such as to not understand the illogical counterintuitive way most people go about their lives. I also have strong nostalgic feelings and visions pertaining to lives in the Greco/roman, Atlantean, Babylon, Norse, and the Court of Versaille eras. I had already attained the ability after my saturnal return 7 months ago to percieve truth and lie completely no matter how nuanced or cleverly crafted and I struggled with what to call it, as I steer clear of pop culture words like 'psychic' because it has discordant energies attached to it , and I feel the history of words and places and the cumulative imprinted karmic energies I guess I could call it, Lastly after 12/21/12 when the whole starseed community was shouting feats of ascension and shifts, I actually felt a calm after feeling threatened by a unseen danger leading to the new hall massacre...,but after feb 2, 2013 and especially around the 6-15 I literally went from my usual emphatic clairvoyance and extreme states of scientific processing power, to waking up to a world in which someone turnt up the volumn, I could hear things, whispers, which as I listened more and freaked out more it was apparent that somehow I was able to hear the environment of a person emotionally connected to me, or an strong emotional event on the planet, after the "asteroids" a day later I felt the floor shake literally and I asked a friend if he felt it and like always u was alone , but then the walls vibrated in my apt and I lost poise and freaked out before asking my friend to leave, because I decided I needed a controlled environment to better understand my new perceptive abilities, I could create geometrical figures and numbers overlayed onto objects and I didn't know which numbers were the good ones and that frightened me, I also started writing algorithms on paper and I noticed I could figure out the theme behind the winning lottery numbers, though all of these things came at such severe head tension that I thought I was really gonna pass out or worse, because that week, I couldn't sleep at all , because I literally couldn't shut off my brain and I was calculating everything from the true shape (as if I could portray this shape, I can't imagine a way to portray it outside of the space in a mind) of the universe, to the numbers and patterns of numbers that keep appearing in my life and those connected to me. All of this said I freaked myself out and then my family and friends when I would do things like text them right after they coughed, and I would be exactly right, which actually just made me feel worse, because that led to the acceptance of others who may have been able to do these things to me and others for who knows how long, it also led to me believing that I was likely a fallen Ancient Greek god or maybe part of the Fae, but not the whole butterfly wings version, similar to true blood Faeries , and I was flabbergasted at how similar I was to the Skokie character, in regards to actually feeling like these things were more of a nuisance that i couldn't control and caused me to become in a permanent state of high alert and panic, jumping at the slightest breeze or pin drop. I won't explain further but I will say that I 'see' what really is. God bless us all.

Hi Candice,

Wow, what a journey! You must be overwhelmed. Hopefully you will get used to it and it will settle down :-) I like the "Good/like God" and I think that it is becoming more attainable lately. I don't know how I would cope in your situation. It sounds challenging... shaking rooms is not fun. You are hypervigilant. I had a similar feeling with PTSD last year, but it has passed.

Here on the 22nd of December we woke up to a strong feeling that a lot of fear had just left the planet. It's been up and down ever since, releasing ancient childhood fears, but new and unusual experiences have been happening too, like feeling an outpouring of creativity through me, which I could only observe, golden light beaming from the heart.. I had a spirit sit in me for a while and make me shake, crystal clear telepathy with the dog, and moments of sheer bliss, which seem to be happening more and more, helping to maintain the positive as a knowing, rather than as a struggle, is getting easier. We are truly changing, actually evolving, and it's wild. I'm starting to get very excited about the future. There is a lot of good news in the world affairs too.

I hope things calm down for you Candice! I'd be calling in everyone I could think of to help: Jesus seems to be the one who has an instant effect when it's going nuts. Thank you Jesus..

Love and light!

Namaste

Moanna

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Replies

Candice Darby February 20, 2013 at 10:31pm

You're right I've found invoking Jesus Christ, and asking as him to bathe me in his light ,as I visualize floating toward a white abyss that makes me become so charged all over I can only describe it as electric, and but I would love to hear from anyone who speaks fluently in 'tongues' and has been able to 'decloak' some frightening illusions, I actually tried to make the cloak reform but it only partially formed back, and I'll take that because before, I wouldn't leave my apt, because most people, when you peer thru the cloak to the soul don't even look mammalian, and lets just say that I've never been found of lizards or snakes, or gremlins whatever that is that is in so many people, lord knows I can hardly look.
- Moanna > Candice Darby February 21, 2013 at 1:22am
  
  I cannot see those things, but I met a psychologist who could. She could see the alcohol entity and the smoking entity on the backs of people, and so on. Could you take away your fear of them, perhaps, at least remove the emotion from it and just observe without reacting, knowing that we all agreed to this craziness.. Nothing happens without our permission. I wouldn't know what I know if I hadn't been so challenged by it all and found the strength to fight back. If I hadn't been so upset I wouldn't have made a make a vow to get to the bottom of it, and it was the best decision I ever made for it has changed my life. The people who have hurt me the most did me a huge favour, on a soul level. Now I know that there are good guys who protect us and we only give ourselves as much as we can handle. The Aboriginal people ask the good spirits to protect them from the cheeky ones. I now see 'evil' people as traumatised and living in fear, and I feel empathy that they do not know how much we are adored by our spirit friends, who know us better than anyone on earth could. Love has the power, not fear. Fear is an illusion and a liar, telling us that everything is hopeless, when it isn't at all. I hope this helps! xx
Moanna February 20, 2013 at 9:23pm

Hi Candice,

Wow, what a journey! You must be overwhelmed. Hopefully you will get used to it and it will settle down :-) I like the "Good/like God" and I think that it is becoming more attainable lately. I don't know how I would cope in your situation. It sounds challenging... shaking rooms is not fun. You are hypervigilant. I had a similar feeling with PTSD last year, but it has passed.

Here on the 22nd of December we woke up to a strong feeling that a lot of fear had just left the planet. It's been up and down ever since, releasing ancient childhood fears, but new and unusual experiences have been happening too, like feeling an outpouring of creativity through me, which I could only observe, golden light beaming from the heart.. I had a spirit sit in me for a while and make me shake, crystal clear telepathy with the dog, and moments of sheer bliss, which seem to be happening more and more, helping to maintain the positive as a knowing, rather than as a struggle, is getting easier. We are truly changing, actually evolving, and it's wild. I'm starting to get very excited about the future. There is a lot of good news in the world affairs too.

I hope things calm down for you Candice! I'd be calling in everyone I could think of to help: Jesus seems to be the one who has an instant effect when it's going nuts. Thank you Jesus..

Love and light!

Namaste

Moanna

xx