Although, other areas of my life are excelling, and I have learnt the power of now, I still, no matter how I progress with the other areas, and how positive I am about them, can't get HIM out of my heart and head. =(
I love him, but the communication between us now is none existent. Even the odd message I send saying hello, does not get a reply. We were like two peas in a pod, and he believed we belonged together. We were even in talks about setting up a creative business together, until, one day, 3 months ago, he just went cold.
I keep dreaming about him too.
Everything reminds me of him
As I say, there are many positive things happening for me right now, and I don't want to dwell on this, but I quite simply, can't stop feeling for him, and thinking about him!
Replies
It was lovely to read this.
Great advice Ina.
Much love.
=)
xxx
I haven't been on the ball with messages of late but will be back in your inbox later this evening when I will have the time and attention. I am babysitting for my 5 month old nephew. Yayyy. =) And his bedtime is 7pm.
Hope you have a wonderfull day.
xxx
I have just tonight given notice that I am going to leave a casual job that I have been doing and enjoying for the last 11 months, the reason being that I had a fallout with HIM, and HE has competely ignored me for more than a week now.
There are multiple levels of irony to this situation, not the least of which is that I was feeling ready to start a relationship with him, which might not sound like much, but was a big deal for me. We have had a very cute mutual-like situation going on for some time now, and I was really just waiting to see if he was serious (now I know that he was, by the intensity of his overreaction, but too late.....)
I am not proud of my behaviour (inner child tantrum!), but it was brief, and I apologised soon after. The response: swearing at me, scary anger, and completely ignoring me ever since.
He is normally very sweet, so it was a big shock to suddenly become the object of his anger and hate. It was like a switch flipped and he cut off all feelings of love and care, to the extent that I could see he was actually wanting to really hurt me (which he achieved).
I have gone through various emotional states over the past week, and have finally accepted that there is nothing I can do to change the situation, much as I would like to.
I don't feel any guilt, because although I messed up, his response has been so out-of-proportion that I know it's not just about me. Most likely my behaviour triggered pain from past situations that he hasn't dealt with.
So unfortunately I can't offer you much advice, as I'm in the same boat. I'm sure there must be a reason for this having happened (ie a spiritual reason) but it's certainly feeling like a pretty tough lesson at the moment. It feels like one of the silliest, stupidest situations I have ever found myself in, and very sad. Makes me very tired of life in 3D (I want to get off!! )
All the best with your situation xx
As for being a trigger, i think you are right that is what hapened i am shure.
I have had a few of those myself and lucky for me i could see my own problems and never attacked or made the other feel bad,
I had to admit my own deep rooted problems a few times after fall-outs myself, and i am always thankfull to my inner self as to the person who trigered them ,for at least like this i move on.
I am sorry, you too, are going through difficult times!
Thankyou for your response. Synchronicity is an awe inspiring occurance, at times, and always brings a smile to me.
I'm glad you have shared your experience here. A new friendship should come from our common ground. =)
Peace, love and light.
I hope you have a lovely day.
Keep your chin up.
=)
Thankyou for this advice. I am going to put it into action straight away!
I am sorry that you have also gone through the same torment as I. Also glad you have overcome it. =)
Blees your heart.
Peace, love and light.
=)
Lol, I'm a little clumsy in the morning. =)
She went cold turkey on me, now 6 month later i realised the main pain i felt and feeling of being left aside or behind was deeper than her, this helped me to let go. For she is just a person passing through my life but the feeling was there before and after. So i stopped conecting her with the feeling and started to clean up.
It took me at least 5 months to do this clean-up, and now i am free of this feeling and open to everything again.
I still love her but i do not miss her actually, it sounds weird but after loosing this feeling of attachment by default i am not interested in what she has-had to give me anymore.
I am still open to a relationschip with her if that would ever be the case but it would not be like before.
if it would be your case with these feelings i mentioned i here put a adress from a person that has made essences of her own,(if you have ever heard of Bach Flower).and one of those i used while doing this clean-up and it is called "Childlike"
These essences will help you get into contact with your inner child and help you balance what you have lost sinds then.
the adress is vivien@sun essence.co.uk.
Take contact and i am shure she will be happy to send you some of the new essences.
These are very wise and helpfull words, that make much sense to me. =)
I have been concentrating on me and my family just lately, my kids and my 5 month old nephew have been bringing much joy into my heart. I am also emersing myself into my jewellery making and creativity, which also lifts the heavy feeling in my heart.
I think alot of my pain has come from not being given the reasons to understand HIS severe change?! It absolutely baffled me initially, and the sense of shock I felt was intense. I have gotten to the point where I refuse to let this pain torture me anymore, but need to find ways to let him go.
Bless your heart.
Peace, love and light.
=)
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