Spiritual Forum

Behavior change –We believe that behavior is where the rubber hits the road, there is no point in giving someone the skills and knowledge and the resources, if they don’t actually do anything different on a day to day basis… Personality is a stable, consistent pattern of thoughts, behaviors and emotions. Behavior is an expression of personality in context. Understanding behavior determines how a given personality will react or behave in certain situations or circumstances.  Often to change the ‘do’ part of someone’s behavior you need to look a little deeper at what their values and beliefs are, how they see themselves and what they want.

A personality trait is a tendency to behave instinctively one way or another, but all behaviors outside physical or mental illness are choices. A behavior is an action or reaction of an organism or object in relation to certain factors in the environment. Personality is a persons relatively enduring characteristics of behavior. To measure or describe the personality of a person one has to observe valid samples of behavior.

Human behavior can be difficult to understand, so as character and personality. But one thing we have to understand is this: Personality is something within you and is always there. On the other hand, one’s character can and may change at some point in life. One can say that personality is one’s soul, the real you, while you build your character through life pattern.

How about help each other with self-esteem, not destroy it.

Building esteem is a first step towards your happiness and a better life. Self-esteem increases your confidence. If you have confidence you will respect yourself and then you can respect others, improve your relationships and become happier... this is not a selfish goal as you will contribute more and share yourself with the world and those around you.

Helping build someone else’s self-esteem is one of the greatest tools known to man. People perform better when they feel good about themselves. Just like loving, when you empower others by uplifting them and making them feel good about themselves, it makes you feel good about yourself too.

Are you a self-esteem helper or destroyer? Do you use this language: "You are not good enough; you can’t do this; this person is better than you; you are not so smart; why doesn't anyone get it? etc.”

This type of talk is destructive to the listener because their subconscious mind absorbs it and begins to unconsciously act on it. This type of talk is poisonous. Moreover, don’t let this be you.

There are always cynical people around us. You know them, bitter, angry, arrogant, selfish. But there is almost a guarantee that you will be remembered more for the positive impact you had on people than by becoming those people who are bitter, angry, arrogant, selfish.

How can we take on the role of encouraging and uplifting others? By being a self-esteem helper, you just might help someone overcome a mental barrier they had placed on themselves.

4 things you can do:

1.Constructive criticism. When you give feedback, let it be accurate but encouraging; not discouraging and deflating. Things do not always go right – (remember that you do not always perform at high levels yourself) and when it comes to feedback time, it is very important that you find a balance between what needs to be said and how to say it constructively. Criticize the act and not the person.

No tongue lashing, no criticizing behind their backs by this act You just showed them respect.

2. Appreciate the people around you. Take time to tell people the good things they do, the things they do right and how much that adds value to you and others. Showing appreciation and love, doesn’t mean that you are weak, it simply means you are treating others the way you would like to be treated. Ever heard of tough love?

3. Listen more than you speak. People often want to be heard. You cannot help someone become better if you do not understand where he or she is coming from. Do you know that listening is a skill? The art of listening is probably one of the most difficult skills to master because our human instinct is to talk and keep talking. Take time to listen to others in order to understand them more and make them feel like they are worth listening to. Moreover you can always learn something new from them as well. Everybody have a story.

4. Share knowledge with others.  If it has a positive impact on you, it will have it on others as well. All in all, one can never have too much self esteem.

Some quotes:

“You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy.” Unknown

“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.” Unknown

“I am afraid to show you who I really am, because if I show you who I really am, you might not like it--and that's all I got.”  

Sabrina Ward Harrison

“There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity.” – Nathaniel Branden

“The golden opportunity you are seeking is in yourself. It is not in your environment, it is not in luck or chance, or the help of others; it is in yourself alone.” - Orison Swett Marden

“Self-esteem isn't everything; it's just that there's nothing without it” - Gloria Steinem

“Psychological freedom, a firm sense of self-esteem, is the most powerful weapon against the long night of physical slavery.”

Martin Luther King, Jr.

 “It takes nearly as much ability to know how to profit by good advice as to know how to act for one's self.”

 François de la Rochefoucauld

“People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. Never esteem anything as of advantage to you that will make you break your word or lose your self-respect.”

Marcus Aurelius (Roman emperor, best known for his Meditations on Stoic philosophy, AD 121-180)

“Self-esteem is different than conceit. Conceit is the weirdest disease in the world. It makes everyone sick except the one who has it.” - Hartman Rector, Jr.

People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within. ~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Reference: motherservice.org and blogface2f.com