In the last week or so...I've gone through a major ego cleansing, and purification. It's been very intense. It started about last week, when I just started questioning and doubting everything about myself, and it made me feel very sad...and I went through what you might call an ego death. I've had several of them already, and after each time the ego would become less and less, but I'd still end up slipping back into it somewhat.
And it's hard not to, because I realize now, it's almost impossible not to have some type of ego when dealing with people, in this world at least. As long as we are separate beings, we will have some type of ego. And the ego is all about images, and how it appears, to others, and to itself...and it's not our real true authentic pure state of being. I know because I've experienced another egoless state, and this time, it was one of complete purity.
I mean real and complete purity, it was like being a baby...or a small child. There was no ego, there was no images, it was pure authenticity. And I don't mean just pure thoughts, but pure feeling. Thoughts, as pure as you can make them, are still part of the ego, or the egoic mind as some call it. Our mind really is not the real part of us, it's a tool. It's the part of us that works with the illusion, the separation, this universe of apparently separate things. But it's not the real part of us, and I know, because I've experienced being in true and complete pure authenticity, the realest, truest, purest part of my being...is being in complete purity and love and innocence. Like a child.
And in that state of utter purity and love...there is no ego. There's no judgment...nothing negative can enter that space. It was a challenge to get into the ego lol Because I was feeling just so pure, and so innocent, and so full of pure love...that you wouldn't think of doing or saying any impure unloving thing to somebody. It was like being freshly born, fresh out of Gods pure love, everything was pure and fresh, in the purest, freshest sense, and you saw everything and everyone, no matter how they are, in the most pure and loving way.
It really was divine. Like pure divinity, absolute divinity. I have experienced pure divine love. And it's a beautiful thing, it's something that can't even be put in words. It's beyond this world.
I remember going to the arena while still in this state, and I felt like I was entering a different world. This world we live in is so impure, and so unloving, and people are so caught in their egoic minds...that true purity of heart is not even on the radar for them. I don't even think they know it exists! I really felt like I was fresh from divine pure love, into this world, and it was weird.
Since then, a few days have passed, and I've tried to stay at that level of purity, but it's very hard. You just can't, it's very hard not to go into some ego when dealing with people. It's hard not to be in complete and utter authenticity of heart...when in this world. Or in this universe I think, because I see ETs and beings in higher realms, and how they are in their channelings, and they clearly are not in complete purity and authenticity. They're not perfect.
I think many people make them out to be the most perfect pure people, but they're not. Because if you're not in a state of just complete and utter purity and love, you're in some type of ego! I don't think true perfection and purity can exist, or be maintained at least, until we are once again, at one with God.
And I've tried very hard to be the most perfect pure person I can be, and it's almost impossible. I've touched the state of complete purity, and it's basically impossible to maintain. And in this world, we do need some type of ego to function, or things would be overwhelming. I remember wanting to go to the mall, and I didn't want to, because I felt the impurity, the low vibes from the people, would be too much for me. It definitely would suck me back into ego, and that's what happened. It's hard not to when you're in this world.
But at least I can say I've touched the depths of purity, and innocence...like the purest most innocent child. And it makes me sad to see just how impure and unloving people can be. And how I used to be. But even sadness is still ego, anything but utter pure love is ego. But at least I've experienced it, and I hope everyone else can too, even if just a glimpse, I think it would change your life.
Thank you for reading! <3
Replies
Well thanks Andy, and I know what you mean, me too I'm basically a recluse, I don't go out with people anymore, or rarely. I think you're right, it seems mankind has forgotten how to live. People are too caught in their egos and their minds...we need to purify again...we need to bond again....that's very important. And I know ego is going to be there as long as we are in separation, and I think we need to purify the ego and keep it in check, like you said. I wish more people would strive to do that. Thanks my friend :)
The more the layers are peeled back to reveal who we truly are, the more we realize how much work you still need to do. Atleast that's where I am at right now. I mean I've been "awake" since 1994 and it was a very intense process, so I am still catching up, and seeing how I've slacked off with my development off and on over the years.
Now I realize it's time to get serious and truly take things all the way.
I think the key is to not be too harsh on yourself, yet also do what needs to be done to get the mission accomplished within yourself. I tend to feel like I need to drive myself really hard right now to make the changes necessary, not that I am pushing, but I feel a very urgent need to get myself cleared out to make way for the "new"...
Good post, thanks for sharing John ~ :-)
That's how I feel too, like now is the time to really get serious, and it's not really serious, but you know what I mean lol Now is the time to, truly, start purifying. Lucky for me, I've spent the last 7 years or so, basically alone...so that's allowed me to explore the depths of what's within me.
Taking time alone is very important for that. Like the monks or hermits who needed to seclude themselves, or Jesus who went in the desert to be alone.....that's important to do, because the process takes alot longer when you're constantly around people, and have to be "on" all the time, you know what I mean lol
I think now is the time, it's 2012 already, we are right on the brink of ascension, so it's do or die time, so to speak lol It's time to get the job done and purify. And we can see, at least I can, the separation of worlds, and who's progressing on their path, and who is stagnant or digressing.
Thanks Delilah :)
Most definitely ~ you said a lot there :) ahaha