Hello kindly once more,

Since my last post, about trauma life, low self esteem, borken-heartedness, unloved dysfunctional environments&parents, loneliness...wretched Gollum life...*weeps* :(

I like to ask this question...Sex what is it?....Porn?.I was never told anything about it, except that its a (taboo...parents!). A sensitive empathic answer I like please. I don't buy all the gender-stereotyped rubbish (brainwashing, propaganda...lies!..Evil illuminati!) of the media! Asides through all the toxic psychotropic drugs I was forced to take (evil psychiatry!...toxic,toxic!) I seem likely to be sexual dysfunctional (erectile dysfunction?!?) , soeme tardive dyskinesia too! Is sex really needed? No idea...I hope I posted this in the right place...Here I post my painting of my broken heart...

8110919070?profile=original

This is my painting...I often paint...I hope the photo is clear enough

I have a broken and sick heart...This so sick world (no empathy...my 'soul seems female' NOT male) gave me more traumas & deep depressions, than anything else! Seem to carry female energy, which this sick world hates. Eaten tons of chocolate, fish, and drowned tons of cups of strong coffee beyond count,still do...addiction, addiction. An Emotional wreck,feel I failed...failed...Need healing, real deep healing!...'Shamanic Healing' is that any good? It mentions 'soul loss' occurring, in the happening of traumatic events (had many) ...That sounds far more plausible than any of that filthy toxic psychiatry fake-science rubbish! [www.cchr.org] But finding one that is within reach and affordable, proves a real pain (the ones I found were in country towns, no public transport]! *river-cries* :( So the issue of finding suitable (sensitive empathic) healing remains...

And this...Planet x is coming in the nearer future...

http://galacticconnection.com/planet-nibiru-is-coming/#sthash.OmMlwAhf.dpbs

http://galacticconnection.com/20-facts-about-nibiru-planet-x/#sthash.f1v7yK92.dpbs

http://galacticconnection.com/planet-x-proof-of-nibiru-despite-nasa/#sthash.r07JQrwT.dpbs

http://galacticconnection.com/planet-x-nibiru-new-nearing-2015-the-planet-goverment-doesnt-want-you-to-know/#sthash.DlFOvtlA.dpbs

http://galacticconnection.com/planet-x-nibiru-sun-blackout-in-march-2016/#sthash.s0pj1LFD.dpbs

http://galacticconnection.com/researcher-predicts-planet-x-of-nibiru-to-flyby-earth-in-2016/#sthash.vZ3mLSaS.dpbs

If this is true, including the prediction of planet x coming sometime next year. Where does that leave poor souls like me?!? I want no ascension, sick heart/soul, trauma, etc...feel this is for me far toooo soon. Asides I had more or less an atheist kind of upbringing, without offense meant...no religion , including all that 'christian' soup which sounds to me ;like a lot $greed-coorps manufacture to spend tons of money on rubbish...Paganism, brainwashing...propaganda, including the so depressive irritating rotten music they blare everywhere (yucky green-red colours)....No thanks! And I already saw some traces of the coming of another commerce pagan $Xmas onslaught now...*dread* :(

I prefer silence to all this noxious depressive noise and $commerce...A trip into the cold would be real good (before planet X)...polar regions...Photos from polar regions seem to have had a strong pull (must have a reason)...Have a number of polar brochures and books. Its true, I always loved cold weather (including thick snow) not hot, which always made me feel real miserable even health endangering (dizziness, mega-headaches...near heat stroke experiences...polar bear sweating and more),...like in a prison, I just cant stand heat! Read in a recent New Dawn magazine about RH-Negative blood types...there its mentioned about unable to stand hot weather....Thats to a great extent my case.....Is that what they mean with nordic blood or? ...Maybe someone can answer this. Had no blood test to confirm yet, but I feel alien, including very strong aversion to hot weather...strong intuition too (childohood)....I forecasted whats about to happen, and parents didnt listen...it was at times very visual flash.... Heat always makes me feel sick...not the cold though...Love snow, and the jackets that I even see in Sydney, I dont need at all...

.Apologies for the lengthy post going to certain extent beyond the initial question...I'm not often online (no internet at home) and hope one understands...And leave with some scene links of polar regions...

~peace & light~

herbert

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/be/Arctic_Sunset.jpg

https://shop.aurora-skycam.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/4/2015/07/lofoten-a_night_to_remember_final.jpg

http://www.arcticphoto.is/wp-content/gallery/aurora/Aurora_Panorama_752Pixels.jpg

http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/image/1207/aurora_goldpaint_1200.jpg

http://wallpaperest.com/aurora-online-wallpaper-009944

http://blog.sunvil.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/Copy-of-Svalbard-43041.jpg

http://www.reidtravel.com/upload/images/CFD6CW_Paradise%20Bay,%20Antarctic%20Penninsula.jpeg

There are sure lots more...May these inspire others...Nature makes art...*peace* 

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Replies

  • 8116198498?profile=original

    Trauma triggers, judgemental, emotional suppression, Ignorance is NOT bliss!...This is food for thought for your judgmental accusive comments! Bullying and judgmental blame.labeling/accusation don't feel far apart for my battered, abused,vulnerable, self-confidence crushed soul! Got no right brain? My parents seemed to not have had one....and a huge stone as heart. What would you do, if you're in a desolate & rather helpless situation and constantly labeled "idiot" , "failure" and even "gay" ?!? I sure didn't invent illuminati either...*coughs* :(

    Hurt (just as sadness) runs real deep in me! If I were you, I would quickly apologise empathically and withdraw the remark...Very likely I'll block you...:(

    Some considerate moderator, please close this thread....enough! *cries* :(

    Hope I can find out what sex is, in a more peaceful lifetime...

    274375-bigthumbnail.jpg

    girl-crying-never-ending-rain.jpg?w=474

    enhanced-buzz-wide-24462-1329860190-2.jpg

    Going soon to ocean to cry...hope it snows too...*cries* :(

    END! *cries* :(

    • Darling you are precious... I sent you a message.... 

  • Hi jaxon, i know exactly what you are sharing and i agree with the core of it, as i am experiencing changing my thoughts and reactions as well and it has made things better in my life.

    However, i was just adding to it, by suggesting to think even bigger than you suggested is all.

    Perhaps if this world contained only me, i could create very quickly the free life that i know many want.

    With all the other co-creators around us, many of them have beliefs, usually drilled into them in one way or another, that is almost always against their own highest good.

    Though it is sold to them in a way that they accept, believing it keeps them safe and secure.

    These observations are from my direct experience from observing and talking with people.

    It's apparent to me, one can think positive thoughts for the highest good of one and all, till the end of time, but unless those around us share and resonate to such frequencies of consciousness, the external reality will change very little.

    One quick basic example, at one point in time, humans did not believe we had to pay to live on the dirt of mother earth.

    At this point in time, many people believe we have to pay something to live on dirt, so if i think big and positive that all shall have all basic needs met without condition and that includes a reasonable chunk of land to grow a few crops and place a home on.

    What do you think will happen when someone tries to use a piece of land freely.

    What will happen is not the fault of one thinking negatively, it is the culmination of conditioning over time, the minds of humans to follow a certain pattern of living.

    I'm not trying to spin your message, i am trying to expand on it.

    As i agree fully, that focusing on the positive aspects of people is far more productive and beneficial to us all.

    However, bare in mind, that this is distinctly different from examining systems and ideas that have been created around us, the living people.

    I despise systems or ideas that attempt to control and divide human beings, with the purpose of enslavement and i always will despise them till the end of time.

    However, i will never despise living human beings for ignorantly following these ways, as they most of time, do not realize what they are doing.

    Speaking about these systems and ideas that attempt to control and divide is not negative or empowering them further as you claim.

    It is shining a light on them for others to see things in a different light, why, because they have been taught that certain ways and things are good for them, when in fact they are not good for them.

    Control and division with intent to enslave is never good for one and all and i will always share this truth, despite another claiming it is negative to do so, or another claiming it is empowering the very thing we do not want.

    Good day and good luck on your journey

    peace love light

  • Hi mcdreamer, i also feel your pain and i see what jaxon is saying.

    People like jaxon are insuating that you or i are to blame for the human living conditions at present.

    That is only a little true, the structures and ideas for human living were already here when we entered this world.

    As far as focussing on the positive nature in human beings, that is good advice and being what you want to see in others, is definitely more good advice.

    Based on your pictures mcdreamer, you are well aware of maleveolent visible or invisible groups in this world, actively trying to keep us all divided, in fear and enslaved to systems that are not for the highest good of one and all.

    Jaxons suggestion of wishing for millions of dollars is not in my perspective thinking big.

    Thinking big, would be to eradicate all such control systems such as money and say this, all shall have their basic needs met by divine birth right and without condition.

    It is only these few dark groups on this planet and apparently many misguided humans as well, that do not want this.

    They fear they will not have their needs met without money, because that is all they have been taught.

    Also, the idea of ownership is another misguided teaching.

    No human owns anything, not even their body and that goes for the cabals as well, who think they own everything.

    Heres a small little example, i was taking a walk through park and cut through a wide open space between houses and a man cutting his grass, stopped and gave me a mean look, so i peacefully waved to him and he waved back.

    I calmed his fears and his false teachings of control and ownership ideas.

    He or anyone else does not own this planet, but that observation today shows that he feels he does, even though the cabal inspired systems he is following, would boot him out of the house and land he thnks he owns faster than you can blink, if he stopped paying his property taxes.

    In essence, we have the blind leading the blind in many of these towns in this world.

    Though i do see some that have been resisting the obvious truth of reality around them, start awakening and voicing the imbalance around us.

    Yes by all means, voice the imbalance, yell to creator that i do not consent to this imbalance and i want all to have what they need without condition.

    As far as sex, enjoy it, just do not force your will upon another.

    peace love light

  • 8115438883?profile=originala little cheer....for you.....

  • 8115436888?profile=originalWhat about an empathic healer...And not predominant that 'judgmental' "Guru Talk"...?!?!?!?!?!? No Drugs!!!...Ice (amphetamine) epidemic in Australia!...Terrible, ought to be banned and removed from everywhere...:(

    I'm too fragile for these apathic zombie psychoward/jail institutions...Deep sadness is not evil...stop being so judgemental...*coughs* :((

    Cant stand guru talk! *freeze* :( Empathy required...Ought to have been clear! :(

    HSP...An acronym for 'High Sensitive Person'...Obviously with lots of traumas...Not all I like to iterate here...Its mainly 'Lisa Omega' who is on the right track...*heart*

    Here my-thoughts on Oz politics which disgusts me amongst others...They've cut so many services, most affecting cases of vulnerables, poor, homeless, and indigenous...This painting is a notion of disgust, I've suffered many hears of emotional and artistic suppression (much in silence) [my heartless parents amongst others tried to smash my soul!]...Nobody ought to be be suppressed! :(

    8115437483?profile=original

    8115437863?profile=originalI leave this pic of my drying abstract oil-painting here, whilst I'm recuperating from this erratic JoJo weather, which doeasnt seem to know what seasons it is...I genuinely cant stand heat...*peace*

  • gender and sex are confusing sometimes.

    "do what u feel" -gronos1

  • Yea, and while you're at it you can also google for "closed psychiatric institution" and "maximum security jail" since that's where he'll be going if he takes DMT while being in the mental state he is today.

    Drugs are NOT the solution to the worlds mental problems.

  • Tormented gollum soul...I feel like giving up. I need healing and answers. This world is so sick to me, makes vulnerable souls like me real sick and depressed. Before I go on...here are two preamble paintings to the broken heart one:

    8115413495?profile=originalSad Black Dog...encomberd,impoverished, feel like a burden, heavy introversion

    8115414070?profile=original

    Crying Gollumn with a message...Thats the question I'm also asking...Who wants me?...Deeply scared and tormented, pretty much totally rejected by this to me 'alien' world of rotten $materialism and noxious mobile phones! I l so loathe those noxious mobile phones...seem to turn many into zombies & robots! Sure I dont have any mobile phone...Apathy seems to reign sadly...

    8115413871?profile=original

    I still don't know what sex is? (amongst other many things). I currently see sex as porn...,an artist in the past tried to pull me into a porn store...disgust, totally disgusted..didn't want to go again!

    And what about RH negative blood possibility and me suffering in too warm/hot weather?.....I wonder where I can get a test, me such a private soul....In summer days I just totally stay indoors, zillions fans blazing, and endless cold water showers...I just cant handle heat, dizziness, rotten headaches, insomnia,...too hot, too bright...need it cool/cold and more subdued light...Soul of the shade, deep and profound. I wanted to emigrate to Canada before, but their heartless materialistic immigration policies prevented it....The seem only want rich/wealthy folk I see...heartless. The politics has become heartless here too...Chucked me out of college studying music...Not because of marks (always had high marks) but their cut-cut policies...This is why I put $Libs in the broken heart painting, sure applies elsewhere I've been...evil politics! I sure have painted politicians too...

    8115413693?profile=original

    Yes Mobile phones...robots seem many to me. 

    8115414091?profile=original

    Illuminati money demon...I just loathe that filth $materialism. I'm amongst those that feel trapped, drained...I cracked on agonizing tormenting computing jobs,...total emotional-nervous breakdown and depression (traumas & nightmares coming)...What did one give me, filthy $psychiatry!  Left me a shattered wreck, now on social welfare...I feel no love from my surroundings. No people, I tend to love animals far more...they at least pick up my emotions, many people dont...apathic, and so occupied with their mobile phones!

    Very sorry that I cant reply to some of the others now...The cursed ticking of the internet credit clock...Hope one is patient till about mid next week...*lots of love, peace & light*....end the Illuminati evil!

    cool, peaceful and profound

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