When i was 8 yrs or 20 yrs old...

LIFES SETTING; my parents were separated, I lived with my father, my sister and brother lives with my mother 60 miles away. I only had them on maybe 1-2 week ands per month and when visiting I really didn't see my mother much, she was busy with the kids or something. My father was gone from 6:30 am to 8pm every day, I didn't have a baby sitter but had plenty of home work from him n school to keep me busy so I had about 1-1/2 to 2 hrs of play every day with my friends, there...

Me: Why do I look the way I do?

Dad: Well because when your mommy n daddy made you you have... "that discussion"

Me Nooooo, I don't look like how im suppose to look, Why was I born now?

Dad: Because your mommy and daddy wanted you so....

Me: No..... I wasn't suppose to be born yet

Dad: So when were you suppose to be born

Me: Not till way in the future! and I don't look like me dad!

Dad: How are you suppose to look?

Me: I don't know I wasn't born yet!!

HE WALKED AWAY SHAKING HIS HEAD AND WITH A CONFUSED LOOK ON HIS FACE

So when I looked in the mirror I would see my face but just grayish color for the eyes and mouth aria like a gray oval... but ive had a fascination with blotchy earth toned skin, black to gray and a browning pink tones, even scales, large black eyes, cat eyes and double cat teeth or k9s, since that age. also circular bone ridge going around the eyes and down the cheeks tapering off and around the jaws curve tapering off towards the chin. Is this odd to anyone? and im still not suppose to be born yet!

Never saw anything sci-fi till the 80s I saw Close Encounters... but i didn't view that as aliens, never even seen the entire movie. The first craft at 10yrs old in 1978 it was a colorful circle shining a green light across three top story windows, 1991 I was in a crap pearl swirly white molded seating craft with three beings, 1999 I saw a black triangle with a green light at each corner underneath, 2002 a gold saucer with a round sphere middle by Weavers Needle heading to the sky, and recently around the beginning of June there were thin clouds by the Superstition Mt and two orange spheres dropped below the clouds playing leap frog with their lights 3 times then they disappeared heading east.

Beings: Ive seen a tall reptilian slash mantis7ft, huge wrap around eyes, small gray zeta 4.0+ and some really blobby brown being about 4ft. Ive seen shadow people that resemble grays all holding hands all over my room and above me. Ive felt their presence around me, seen silhouettes with a slight hint of light in my room. Ive seen spirits my entire life from fog to black evil to full body apparitions just with out feet.

Never saw anything scifi till 1999 which was Farscape and LEXX, strange!! I never watched anything for any influences so I don't understand this, ive always believes "We exists why cant others like us exist?"  and I don't understand why in the hell I still don't look like what I look like and im still not suppose to be born yet! so does this mean im from a different dimension? from the future? I do believe in reincarnation when my beliefs//teachings practice "none of this"

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DIDACTICS OF SELF-KNOWLEDGE-CHAPTER-VI-PART TWO


      

Q: Master, regarding the stillness of the Mind and a quiet Mind, what can you tell us?

 

M.: Well, naturally, we must distinguish between a Mind that is still and a Mind that is quiet, between a Mind that is silent and a…

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