Managing Anger and Rage <a href="http://www.indigocoach.net/managing-anger-rage/">http://www.indigocoach.net/managing-anger-rage/</a>

Keeping kids safe these days is at the top of many parents’ worry lists. There are many things to be worried ABOUT these days — but for parents of Indigos, one of them is the anger factor.
We Indigos come hard-wired to react with anger at any and all of the following things:
injustice

“stupid” people (people who are not behaving as if the God in all things matter)
lies

anything not coming from Love/motivated by greed, self-centered personal gain, or with intent to harm
systems and institutions that do not serve (when they are “supposed” to)

helpers who harm (either intentionally or through carelessness)

and a whole string of related items (name your favorites here)

The fact of the matter is, for us Indigos managing our own anger at being on a planet that is not what we KNOW it can and should be (umm, “not living up to its potential”???) — gets the benefit of our attention (usually angry.)

Now, an evolved Indigo knows and understands how to USE anger as a tool — and not to be a victim of it. We can understand that it is just a feeling, and that we can use the energy of it to accomplish something good. It can help us to direct our considerable creative powers to take effective and hopefully compassionate action, that will catalyze the necessary changes. It requires us to:
be clear about what the ideal might be (we usually are crystal clear about this)

communicate it clearly to others — in a form that they can hear. This is challenging — and can be a skill we Indigos would be well served to master, if we haven’t already. We must be able to get the information into a form that the people and institutions we target for change can DO something with, not just react against. People in general don’t like change (unlike many Indigos who thrive on it.) That one is a hard lesson to learn!

Control our own emotions and not be in reactive mode. To take the time to process our feelings and think through what a positive action might be for us to take.
Just this week I had one of those “opportunities” to exercise that muscle. I came up once again against the institution of health insurance — which as most everyone knows is a dying, extremely dysfunctional structure.

Maybe the stars were aligned badly or something, but I spent at least an hour in one of the deepest rages I have felt for some time. For almost all of the reasons identified above, actually.
The bad news is — no, we don’t ever entirely overcome our hard-wiring. The impulses are always there, just waiting to be triggered. Sorry.

The good news is that we CAN learn what to do with ourselves when this happens. We do NOT need to create an “incident” that escalates the problem. We CAN manage our own emotions and master them. Between the many phone calls that were required, I spent some time meditating, taking flower essences, and calming my spirit. I called a friend to vent and say what’s going on. I listened to their wise advice.

And before I picked up the phone for the next call, I blessed the outcome for the greater good. I need to tell you, it took ALL of the steps I’m mentioning here, to help me through this one.
I don’t feel good about myself when I respond with so much anger inside. I know that this is not helpful, if I were to express the powerful intensity I feel.

But I also know that I have it for a reason. I need to DO something useful with it. I need to channel it into a powerful action. And this, I will do. In my own time and in my own way. I will exercise self discipline, which I have learned painfully over many years, and then act. I feel more self-esteem when I know that I can master the powerful feelings, rather than allow them to dictate what and how I will respond.

Being response-able is a very important thing. We who parent and teach must start early with the young Indigos, because it is not something we are born with — we need to develop the Mastery Muscle of self discipline. Failure to do this results in suicides and some of the tragic mass murders that we have seen. We can prevent these. And we must!

What mosts helps an Indigo when we are triggered is

someone to listen to us, to really hear us and hear our pain

someone to help or coach us through to our own self mastery of the feelings, rather than tell us what we should be doing or how to behave

flower essences, to put our sensitive electrical circuits back in proper shape

time to get calm and to gain perspective on the situation.

Help your kids and teens — and help yourself, if you are the Indigo — by taking these steps. It makes a world of difference. Coach them through the mastery process — and master self discipline yourself.

For those who are interested, I am working right now on a series of new flower essence formulas, one of which will help Indigos (and everyone, actually) with the issues of self-mastery of anger.

The other essences in the series will help with the fluctuations in our energy fields, help us not to take on energies from outside ourselves (whether that is from other people or the environment or from electrical and electronic devices.)

For more information about the flower essences, I hope you will join my other blog, Dances With Flowers http://www.danceswithflowers.com. I will be posting the news there (and will try to update here also — but you will get it over there first.)

Meanwhile, if you are a parent of Indigo kids or teens, or an Indigo yourself, there is hope for the anger! You can help your kids by modeling healthy expressions of anger (hint: this does NOT mean to keep it bottled in!), to learn how to work with and manage your own emotions, and to learn what their purpose is in your life.

Don’t be afraid of the anger — be afraid of what you will mindlessly do with it, until you know how to work with it and have it serve you. You can do this! I promise!

2 Responses to “Managing Anger and Rage”
# Carolynon 31 Oct 2011 at 11:34 am
This is so true! I’m an adult Indigo who’s always angry. I’m SO disappointed in life and the way we live on this planet. I get so mad cuz i know we can do so much better than this. I’m so tired of all the 3D nonsense. I need to find ways to deal with my anger better ,because i know i walk around looking angry all the time, but i just can’t help it.
# Nancy Boydon 01 May 2012 at 11:22 am
Hi Carolyn, Thank you for sharing your struggle with anger. There are a number of safe ways to deal with anger, but you need to try ones that especially call to you. The first method I would recommend is for you to go out into Nature and get quiet. Just BE! Allow yourself the space to process your feelings, and to connect with Source. In the stillness is both comfort and inspiration. It’s worth doing.
Some people find it useful to “give” their anger, sadness, pain and grief to the earth to be recycled into useful energy. You can put your hands directly onto the earth and just release everything. Release is important! Don’t allow negative energies that arise to dwell inside you; let go of them and allow fresh new energy to come in to take its place.
Some of the tools I use to help with anger (or any strong emotions, really) are flower essences http://www.brightwingsessences.com and a Native American aromatherapy http://www.liquidsmudge.com product to clear my aura and my space, and then to ground long-lasting positive energy around me. You could try them and see if they help. If you’d like a brief consultation about which flower essences http://www.brightwingsessences.com might work best for you, let me know. I’m a Certified Practitioner and can help guide you in choosing appropriate remedies when you’re ready.
Also remember that feelings are like the wind; they arise and blow through — if we let them

Indigo Children Focus Group

Managing Anger and Rage http://www.indigocoach.net/managing-anger-rage/

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