Empathy and toxic relationships from my experience

Oh man was I shaken up by this recent argument with one of my "toxic" relationship. It's hard considering they are from your family, but the negativity was electric. It was awful. Every time I get into the same argument with the same person and the same underlying message, I try to point it out in a the nicest way possible. Though it often gets lost because people are so irrational when angry and while I want to understand why they were acting so hostile towards me, I know I must protect myself. We usually never reach agreement on the other side, I mean it's easier to get a hippo to agree in moving out of the waterhole then this person. Common courtesy is also out the window with this person as well. It just kind of bums me out that I am always the punching bag and people lay their crap to my doorstep. The more understanding and "happier" or positive I become, the greater the degree of anger, sadness, or what have you comes to me. I know that they aren't my emotions, but I am still an empath after all so it made it hard for me to stay stable. I basically ran from the room and went to my room because they were just too negative for me to handle. Now they are acting like it's nothing while just the other night, yelling in my face and attacking me as a person was going strong. It really leaves me confuse about how some people can be like that. I have no control over them and so I just deal with my hurt and that's it. I promised myself prior to this situation that I will no longer let stuff like this get to me., oh irony. Obviously, I was really hurt by how it went down. There's pretty much nothing I can do about their reactions. I choose to take out of this that I need to live and let live. Let them be who they are because confrontation is never good for people who are set in their rightness. Not everyone warrants my time and gentle care. Toxic relationships when we can't get away from them we should emotionally distant ourselves as a means of self-preservation. It wouldn't be fair to myself to keep subjecting myself to such a thing when it gets nowhere. I've tried my hardest and all I can do is pray about it. I trust that in time, I will move pass and the other person either leaves my life or takes their pain somewhere else. It's not dump your trash day on me anymore. I am not responsible for their pain and though I want to help it's not possible for this person. I'm going to kick these toxic relationship to the curb. No more. I've had enough of it.

Another note to empaths, don't try defending another person's wrongful actions towards you. An empath can care too much you know to the point of neglecting yourself. It's not fair to yourself if you give excuses for why the other person is throwing all their negative venom your way. It's kind of similar to domestic abuse situations. Don't use that victim mentality either it just hinders your growth. We all want to play the blame game whether it's towards someone else or on ourselves. You don't deserve such treatments and there is no excuse you can find for it. Move on and let it go. Just hold onto your peace of mind and walk away from it with understanding not avoidance.
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  • i understand this so much, as i have many rows with close members of my family but ive had to back away as its too damaging to me, they wont change ever and now i have to continue alone with out them and it hurts me to do this as i like their presence but the damaging words and things they use towards me is destroying me, so ................................... i hate parting so much ................................. it has also happened to close friends who i have had for many many years and this is heart breaking too ........................
  • You must detach.

     

    They are protecting their ego.

     

    We're just from another galaxy

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