hey look i'm an un-kown poet, allot of people say they love my poetry but not many really take the time to appreciate it all in full!
i know this isn't really spiritual but i have seemed to be able to reach out to quiet a few people here and find something else in these people that i don't see everyday in people, so i was wondering if anybody happens to like poetry or has any suggestions i have a blog for ALL my writing and the only follower is myself -__-
naturally meaning there are no comments and absolutly NO feedback!
i know it's kind of selfish but how is a poet suppose to find passion if nobody else take's the time to bother!
atleast read this poem and make up your mind weather you want to be bothered with the rest, a link will be found at the bottom of this page under the poem,
thank you for your time Goofy :-D:
a lovers loss, no greater pain
for when he left, her heart was strained
got what he wanted, and nothing is left
...now he has gone, he knew her best
the naked flame, that once was lit
has gone out cold, inside her chest
will they notice, if they see her whole
nothing but nude, shock factor alone
as this goes out, the single smoke
she cherished the flavour, yet put it out
like the boy that once was, now a shallow mid drift
for now that's it's cold, her bed doesn't fit
he left a huge whole, inside of her soul
left her alone, in the night to be cold
this buety alike, many more to come
for heartache and pain, the cure that known
written by: ashley smith
22/11/2010
Comments
written by: ashley smith
5.12.2010
as time goes through, it's vicious ways
on and on, spins around for days
when does it stop why do we bother
where is the peace, and the valour
the endless nights, and fearful dreams
the things between, that tend to cease
when it's time it's time, and not till then
an impatient man, can't wait till then
with two side's grace, yet both without honour
who does come first, or maybe neither
to think aloud and not to choke
yet see things coming, no time to cloak
now at an end, we all must see
it will be done, not gracefully
so here we are, once again
with lovers torment, and the world that does spin
ow and i don't always like analysing it's just what my brain does (more the point over analysing (i also have sensative eye sight, hearing, taste and smell) when i hear the wind i don't just hear the wind i hear every branch move, every leaf, every insict and i hear them as seperate things but all together if that make's sence, it drive's me insane, infact being autistic my world is hell at time's!
my lonliness is doubled since i have a girl i really really like who feels the same but she's in vietnam doing charity work and photography and art and things, she earns a bloody lot of of money, infact the other day she went to work and came home like $4,000 richer -__-, wich irritate's me a little since i'm not working at the moment (just moved to QLD) and i have to save that much to do the entire holiday and although i'd never ask her to pay for me, it's a little annoying when she gets upset and lonely and wants me there to the point where she's in tears, yet if she wanted to that badly one single shift could afford to get me there -__-
even though i would probably not accept it, it tends to make me question how badly she really does!
Love and sex where always 2 things and 2 parts of the brain i try not to understand!
wich is ironic because i'm good atleast one of those and it isn't love lol ;P
ow believe me my soul has had plenty of time to do that lol
i know it's what i tell her, it will happen when it's meant to and in it's own time!
yer i know there are heaps out there on this site, in wich i'm glad i joined :)
i do my best to find level ground, i really do but some days it just kinda take's over is all!
ow and my entire life is based on balance!
i will do my best there is plenty of work to do around the yard this weekend so i dare say i'll be busy enough lol!
i'm glad i hope you enjoy my work to it's fullest :)
best wishe's goofy :-D
i don't know that it is anything it's just what happens now, i don't panic or fear i just see the solution and do it, however i also look and analyse as i go if that make's sence!
i know and each thing has taught me something new, it's just getting hard and i'm waiting ffor the good karma to come my way!
i'm sorry i wasn't really after an answer it's just i'm lonely so it's affecting my judgement atm is all, as i said before good days are really good and wise, my bad days are just as intense, it's simular to bi-polar!
i mean through all that has been what the bloody hell am i being prepared for that is going to be so devastating and effectual towards the world that i'd NEED to be the calm person in the situation!
to be honest after everything i've been through and all that i've learn un-neccasirly as it stands, what purpose does this strength and reasoning come to?
i have been through allot so what i mean by this statement is that all the bad things and the living hell i went through growing up and even today suffer as a result in forces me to genuinly appreciate all that is good and beautiful in this world, it means when something amazing happens i get a higher level of respect for it and take the extra moment to truly value the little moments in life!
if i was to write down everything that's happened to me in the last 8 months alone, it would take up half a page and that's in list form!
wich might i add i have actually done, so if i put together the bad in my life up until now, well i could fill a book!
i choose to be peacefull because i have seen death, had people die in my arms, other by drugs and others by stupiduty (usually in cars) and some where just thier time!
i have litraly going head to head with death itself when it came to my ex, and aparently it was just her time because all the power and being in the world and i still had to let it take it's toll!
here's a poem that describes it better, infact here's 2 that i believe are revelant, no 3 because of the miscarige!
with every strip that they take from my mind, body and soul, another one grows in it's place stronger and faster, the further they drag me down and the harder i fall, the more determaned and the higher i'll climb, i do not stop, i do not give in and do not take take prisoners, so get out of my bloody way, I'M COMING THROUGH!
baby
He watched and he laughed, and felt more alive
As a young un-born baby was growing inside
His eyes lit up, with constant joy
With each morning after filled with, daddy is here
When the words left her mouth, his smile appeared
...With all so much hope, father of the year
But sadly this was not to be, his baby was gone
No father of the year
The loss made him weak, too much to bear
He could hardly breathe there was no longer air
As his heart split in two, and shattered around
He lost the one thing that was never around
The wrong time, the wrong place
Not ready to start
No money, all fear this was not in his heart
He come to his head, and thought out aloud
This child was mine, and know it is gone!
So with every tear-drop, that falls down his face
He thinks of the good times, the glory and grace
For when it is time, he shall be whole once again
Father and child, together once more
But not till he’s ready, to do it again further-more
By: Ashley Smith 13-09-2010
it seems aparent that one of my poems is lost (for now) it will show up when it wants to, they always do :)
when i refer to not knowing what's going on, it's simular to astro travelling, it happens when i see a painting, i head back into it's soul and see and hear and feel what the artist was feeling hearing and seing at the time, it reminds me of my own experience and when both of those get put together well you get poems like shallow breeze (the one in the original blog post!
it has an attatchement of my sould forever embedded inside, some of them are about experience's, others about what i've seen, and some is just the will to say F' OFF i'm going to succeed no matter how far back you drag me!
what i mean by what i say is that i have very little control over myself, my ENTIRE world come's to a SCREECHING halt and the only thing left in my brain is the intensity of the words, it's like having a riddle running around in your brain and the only way to solve it to be free is to release the words onto paper, wich brings me to my next point, ANYTHING can trigger it!
the comment you just posted sent my mind into a daze and this is what came out!
i will let you read the UN-edited version so you have an idea of what i mean!
p.s feel priveledged i RARELY EVER let ANYBODY see my work before it's completed and passed my personal standerds :0
enjoy ;)
rays of sunshine, out in the sun
a warm welcomed happiness, for this heart is young
for all the world to see, and so much more
the glory and fame, cannot be un-done
for once it is over, well and complete
it is but the faith, that make's him feel deep
to be inspired and just not let go
for this is the moonlight, and many will glow
where doe's this all come from, how does it all peer
for nobody knows, but the man that is here
when feeling and warmth, does fill him up
he cannot but help, to just let it out
for when there is passion, and lots amoungst us
with no way to show it, so let him express
through words alike, the one he so idols
where far from few, he does not yet dordle
much work to do, and place's to see
so why not read on, if you like what you see
and there history is facinating
yer it is somewhat un-heard of but somewhat well known!
nah it's all good sarcasm facinate's me lol, i.e big bang theory (sheldon) t.v serie's!
most likely that's another social skill that i lack, i.e restraint lol
haha lol, if i think about it it's easy to remember!
haha lol, i'm good but not always that good, i like to physically look at things lol
yes i need sleep, night hun :)
feel free there not going anywhere lol, and there will be more soon-ish lol
i was talking to a friend about this girl and insperation possesed me and this is what came out!
i still don't really know how to explain what happens usually i don't know myself, but hell here's the end result!
bliss
the moon will shine with the stars above
for beauty knows no name
the sparkle in her eye once more, for she is fair game
with sight intact and tact full heart, the lovers bliss is clear
but when she turns and looks his way, he knows nothing but fear
she will be his, and forever more stay that way for good
in his arms she will remain and comfort will play it's tune
the sun will set and daylight comes for this is not a game
so when she opens up her heart, it will spell his name
written by: Ashley smith
1.12.2010 10:36pm
i was facinated with thier culture and thier explanation with things!
i only have a mild case of autism i.e aspergers syndrom
so i have been able to learn certain social skills (not the best and still struggle with sarcasm and hints but i'm getting better) my facination in total is storie's, i love storie's but they have to be detailed, hence the reason i love movie's and especially t,v serie's
i can walk into a video store and a person will look at two movie's and not know what to get and talk with thier partner and randomly my brain kicks over and give's full descriptions inc story line's and base judgement of the show or movie!
but i can't remember what i ate for breakfast or what day it is lol
i don't mind reading others poetry, it's only that i have so much going on in my mind that i can't afford to jumble any more stuff in thier as is :/
an aspi's brain does not stop working, i have often had dreams where i am working out my problems and analysing in my dream!
can get rather frustrating!
here is a good link about autism (asperger syndrom!)
keep in mind that i'm only mild though and not severe wich the information is based upon:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger_syndrome
i am like that to, if something catch's my attention i need to know everything about it and can't stop or sleep until i do!
i did the same with computers when i was 10 pulling apart the old mans computer, by the end of it all he just found me 6 or 7 old computers and said right, keep yourself occupied and AWAY from my expensive computer and build one using these, 3 hours later i had 4 computers and was installing windows lol
you could only imagine what happened when some ass decided to question me on the meaning of life, 7 hours and 3 back to back page's later i had an answer lol
infact LATER I.E TOMMORROW i will make a blog of it, only because i need sleep and need to keep my mind AWAY from that topic or it will not stop!