my girlfriend saw my 2nd facebook account and now thinks that i'm a single man, my friend at the same time, told me he was about to kill himself and since his state of mind isn't right i believe he honestly was about to!
it's my dead ex girlfriends birthday and 2 days ago was her 1 year anniversary of her death, my ex girl is the sister of the girl i'm dating now who is pregnant with twins and EVERYBODY PHONE IS OFF
what the HELL am i gonna do, i feel like i'm dead inside after all this and i can't loose her, she's all i got left!
i don't mean to vent on a spiritual site but i can't be this honest and get honest feedback or help anywhere else, others just don't understand!
there all sheep or players!
Comments
thank you 1happykelly, although the children aren't from me and they came to be by very bad circumstance's (rape) i will treat them as my own and raise them as such, both being girls and probably just as stubbern as thier mother it should be interesting, but i will be just fine, couldn't be happier to be honest!
as for my friend i am aware he will thank me soon enough, but at the moment his girlfriend will polute his mind and since she is such a young soul and just as young a person she has little experience in this world and hasn't learnt much about life in general, although i have seen much pain and darkness i feel priveledged to know it since i use it to help drag others into the light and out of thier dark corners of thier minds :)
i doubt he will try and pull that one twice!
much love and light to you to sister, may the days to come be clear and faithfull
1happykelly: thank you for kind words and support i do feel a change in both directions and since i'm grey they both effect me to full extent, but i know how to control myself and stay PURELY light and a good person, it's a shame others can't, but i stay positive where i can :)
Life: i sit up right from time to time and i keep my blond streaks and tips going regularly and look after myself to look and feel good and so does my mrs :)
she does not "offer" anything so she is un-able to deliver already, she speaks of many ancient prophecie's and old talk amoungst the many gods of this universe, but the most powerful is love and positive thought!
i try not to judge another without hearing thier side and even then other people's opinions may not be mine but i value them as if they where!
might i ask you to do the same?
luke skywalker (lol): i am following my heart and although the road it chose for me is tretorouse and one in wich many would fear to walk and many more dare not follow, in the end it shall lead me where i belong, i do my best to hang in thier and that i shall!
EXO: i did not write single on purpose it was a temp thing, it now says in a relationship like it should of, i gues being lazy got me in more trouble than what it was worth this time, i shall be sure not to make the mistake twice!!!
genteelwolf: thank you and namaste, i follow an old way of meditation, buddist is my favourite :)
it sooths' the soul!
Captin Sayzarzillion>: i would but the loony bin hasn't caught me yet so i dare not push my luck old friend, and the 2nd account is not to fool people but to keep my relative's at arms length so they may keep an eye on me but not be able to fully interfear with my life in wich they are so good at!
there is a fine line between caring and judgemental and my family crosses both with open arms :P
indigo1955: i have never honestly thought of that, i may well go to an AA meeting but i must be careful people talk to often with closed ears and minds and i must get work yet!
thank you my friends:
before i begin to respond, i sat down lit up a smoke or two (i shouldn't have so many but stress) took a deap breath and thought positive and thought to myself "NO, FUCK IT (excuse the language but it's at all neccisary) i'm taking control of this and i can't afford to loose or suffer anymore it's not my fault but by damn if i'm sitting back and taking this shit, i called my friends father and tried to contact his mrs, rang the police and what not, and i thought hard about my girl and through our bond i sent as much love and care and need as i had in my very essence in hope she would sub-conciously respond and so with my friend
my friend didn't do it he almost got taken away by police for the night, his girl hate's me (she did before anyway for being a spiritual person) and took out threats wich did not work, and he threaten to beat me cause i called his dad, maybe next time he'll think twice before bluffing that crap to me, i take it seriously and act accordingly and as such have lost respect for him!
my girlfriend got online and responded i have a single facebook for friends so i can swear and tell dirty joke's and rude picture's and be a normal guy, have fun (within reason ofcoarse) then i have a 2nd account wich is proper for family and relitive's and the younger family friends, in other words one account is stricktly PG whilst the other is me hanging at the pub with the boys kind of account, she is angry at me and being preg with twins made it worse but she understands this now and when she cool off wich will be soon it will be ok,
now for response's!
Well said Kelly, I aggree... everyone is feeing the Ascension blues... even those who are asleep... there are a few sleepers in Ashtar Command I have noticed !
you have a beautiful heart my sister.. and I'm with you.... and Goofy, hang in there buddy... we're all going through it... the only thing I can say to you is follow your heart my brother.... it will all be fine ok.
Love.